We need more people children like him.

My woman and I, along with my dog Stretch, attended a Tea Party today. This young man spoke for over an hour...took questions for about 45 minutes...all without notes or a teleprompter...shooting from the hip, he was.

Anyway...got an autographed copy of his book.

Child Prodigy?... I don't know about that...but he is a very smart home-schooled young man. Very impressive.

I personally know many Medical Doctors...from Oral Surgeons to Neurosurgeons. They do not support Obama, his Mob, and socialized medicine at all. They all believe Obama's health care "plan" will bankrupt their profession (the health care industry). These are smart people, caring people, and they don't shoot from the hip.

They will go do something else...

We are about to turn to port when we should turn to starboard.

Anyway, read this. Nothing you probably didn't already know.

I'm telling you...if Obama's health care fiasco is passed...we're in deep shit...your children, and grandchildren are in deep shit. Your parents are in deep shit. We are all in deep shit.

People need to fight the fight. I'm not kidding you.

Many people say "it is what it it is"...I disagree. You can do something...like getting involved in the issues that will influence your future, and the future of your parents and your children.

Obama and his Mob must go. The real question is: How much of the damage the Bobo administration has caused, can be reversed?

It is game time.

If you stay on the outside looking in, you have lost the game.

I'm just sayin'

The US has lost over 4000 service men and women due to combat and non-combat related deaths in Iraq and Afghanistan since 2002. That's almost 7 years. Each month over 35,000 Americans die in car accidents. Around 10 Americans die each day to drowning. That amounts to about 3,500 per year. Homicide deaths in Chicago alone, outpace Iraq/Afghan combat deaths. Washington, DC would double it. I could keep going, but there is no need. You get my drift. Do the math.

I haven't talked about lighting strikes, yet...or more than two cities.

I'm just sayin'

You know, lots of people detest FOXNEWS, but the fact of the matter is...they are blowing the doors off the more liberal channels. I don't really care for O'Reilly...I think he is arrogant, but I do think he looks at both sides. I think he is an asshole, but I still believe he is fair...needs to stop calling people by their last names...rude. I started listening to Hannity when I was in Atlanta and he was doing talk radio...before he went to FOX. He's straight up, and did you know, he dropped out of college for financial reasons...never returned. One thing I can say about Beck...his research team is spot on...gets his facts straight. Greta is smart, although her producers make her, often times, talk about stupid shit that doesn't matter...but, when she's on her game...she is definitely "on her game". If I needed an attorney...I'd take her in a heartbeat. Baier came up through the ranks...good for him...not opinionated. Shep the Mississippi boy, well anyone who can do this , and get away with it, is cool with me.

Not that it matters.

Just Sayin'

CABLE NEWS RACE
MONDAY, AUG. 24, 2009

FOXNEWS O'REILLY 3,440,000
FOXNEWS HANNITY 2,937,000
FOXNEWS BECK 2,810,000
FOXNEWS GRETA 2,450,000
FOXNEWS BAIER 2,066,000
FOXNEWS SHEP 1,860,000
MSNBC OLBERMANN 1,114,000
CNN KING 1,063,000
MSNBC MADDOW 885,000
CNN COOPER 827,000
MSNBC HARDBALL 640,000

Our elected officials "politicians" are now refusing to attend town-hall meetings...why is that?

As Thomas Jefferson said. "Question with boldness" What is wrong with that? I happen to agree with him.

What are they afraid of? The truth?

I love a good argument as much as I love a good game of Chess, and I've been wrong many times before...but at least I have the balls to express my opinion as I see and believe it...makes my moves better as well...I don't cower to anyone. Never have...never will.

An educated public will ensure a better government, maybe...we're going to have to crawl before we can walk...

We're in deep trouble.

Just sayin'

This is worth reading...One man's opinion.

There is some other interesting stuff here

Just sayin'

They only thing that freak did for me was record Thriller. I traded the cassette to a Mexican cab driver for a 4 hour round trip from Cancun to Tulum and back, plus a cooler of cold beer and wait time.

In a field one summer's day a Grasshopper was hopping about, chirping and singing to its heart's content. An Ant passed by, bearing along with great toil an ear of corn he was taking to the nest.
"Why not come and chat with me," said the Grasshopper, "instead of toiling and moiling in that way?"
"I am helping to lay up food for the winter," said the Ant, "and recommend you to do the same."
"Why bother about winter?" said the Grasshopper; "We have got plenty of food at present." But the Ant went on its way and continued its toil.
When the winter came the Grasshopper had no food and found itself dying of hunger - while it saw the ants distributing every day corn and grain from the stores they had collected in the summer. Then the Grasshopper knew: It is best to prepare for days of need.

--Aesop

There's rabbits in there...

...and my dog Stretch knows it.

They won't be there for long...I know that.

Ever seen a Dachel catch a rabbit? They know when they're going to zig and not zag. He's going for full Teckal.

Dackel versus Teckel

"In Germany dachshunds are widely named as 'Dackel' (both singular and plural). To be classified as a full Teckel, these dogs must undergo Blood Tracking tests. Classically, any dog of dackel heritage is given an official tattoo upon one ear. After suitable training, the dog must then follow a blood trail that is at least 48 hours old successfully to its conclusion. Once this is completed, another tattoo is marked on the other ear to denote full Teckel rank. As 'Teckel' are bred for hunting purposes, teckels tattooed or not, tend to be visibly larger in their chests than their dackel counterparts, though marginally shorter in length."

My woman has directed me to cut one cent out of our daily budget, which makes about as much sense as Bobobama's $100 million cut to our federal budget.

Let's see, $100 million represents a fraction of his $3.6 trillion budget proposal, and will do little to erase the more than $1.2 trillion deficit. You do the math.

I love this from the supreme commander..."We have an obligation to make sure that this government is as efficient as possible, and that every taxpayer dollar that is spent is being spent wisely"

He continues, "We also have a deficit, a confidence gap when it comes to the American people, and we've got to earn their trust, they've got to feel confidence that their dollars are being spent wisely."

Please, give me a break. I didn't just fall off the .......... truck.

Hobson's Choice is defined as "an apparently free choice when there is no real alternative". Google it if you like. I'm not talking about renting or selling horses.

Anyway, anyone draw any parallels here?...with the idiot Bobobama and his cronies who are in the drivers seat?

We're in deep shit. This turns my stomach. I know, I know, this photo has been all over the place. I just used it to illustrate a "sell out."

I hope all the assholes who voted for Bobo are happy now, and I hope they're ready for some Change...because Hope is standing at the emergency exit waiting to Break Left.

To me, it is unbelievable how stupid gullible some people are.

I am pissed.

...or the Communist News Network or the Clinton News Network or the Censorship News Netwrok...whatever. I understand that CNN's ratings are way down. It doesn't surprise me at all. Maybe people realize the Obama Love Network is as biased as bias is. Maybe the American public can see through Wolf Blitzer, Candy Crowley, Jack Cafferty,,,etc. They don't report facts...they spin everything. They are about as anti-American as can be. They do not report on the news, but invent liberal talking points in place of reality. Take Christiane Amanpour for example...she blames all the worlds problems on the United States. 9-11, Israel, starvation, you name it, it is the fault of the United States. Ted Turner and Jane Fonda should have never split up...they came out of the same hole...traitors, both of 'em.

I could go on and on and on, but I won't, because I find it painful.

One thing is for certain...many donkey ass people watch CNN and believe if CNN says the elephant is pink...it is pink.

I report...you decide.

Democrats today say the donkey is smart and brave, while Republicans say the elephant is strong and dignified. Who you gonna call?

Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little over 60 years ago, witnesses claim that an unidentified flying object (UFO) with five aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and cattle ranch just outside Roswell , New Mexico. This is a well known incident that many say has long been covered up by the U.S. Air Force and other federal agencies and organizations.

However, what you may NOT know is that in the month of April 1948, nine months after that historic day, the following people were born:

Albert A. Gore, Jr.
Hillary Rodham
John F. Kerry
William J. Clinton
Howard Dean
Nancy Pelosi
Dianne Feinstein
Charles E. Schumer
Barbara Boxer

See what happens when aliens breed? I certainly hope this bit of information clears up a lot of things for you. It did for me. No wonder they support the bill to help illegal aliens!

Now You Know.

As I've said, I've been going through some old stored stuff. I found some photographs of some old friends. This reminds of the time a good friend and I had a major disagreement. He told me he was "already gone" I said, "that's okay, because I already left with your girlfriend". I saw him 20 years later. He asked "whatever happened to her?" I told him she was "already gone". We fell over laughing...had a few beers, and we are still good friends today. I still don't know what happened to the chick, but we both agreed, it was fun while it was fun.

This is the lineup I remember.

He told me, you should "write some of this shit down." I told him, "it's probably a good thing that cameras hadn't evolved back then". That was another several beers and laughs.

It just goes to show you, "the good thing ain't everything"

I, still to this day, wonder what happened to her. She was a doll.

Jimbo boils it down and cuts to the chase. Short and not sweet...and I feel the same way.

Bad and Really Bad

What can I say?

It was what it was...and so were the girls...we were lucky...just plain damn lucky...but we didn't complain. Not at all. My friend Coolbreeze and I are still, to this day, tight. We can tell stories that most people wouldn't believe...no matter...we lived 'em.

Cleaning out some drawers...finding some memories...it could be worse.

I am now a right wing motherfucker...Who could have guessed?

...is exactly what Bobobama needs.

6 keystrokes...and press return/enter

"Even those who work to prevent something (bad) can be hurt or damaged by it."

I say...keep your eyes open. Envision the end-game.

Lex put this link up.

Way good. You'll need about an hour an a half.

Oh hell yes!!!

I think it should be closed and each one of the detainees placed in the homes of each liberal weinie who has responded in the affirmative. Although he said he will, I don't believe Obama will close Gitmo any faster than he will raise taxes on the rich or any of the other ridiculous "promises" he has made and cannot keep. He is a "pleaser" who will run his administration ala Bill Clinton through polls and popularity contests. After all, lookin' good is better than doing good! Right!!

What possible good can come from closing Guantánamo? Someone please explain this to me.

Although, I believe Obama will be forced more to the middle than he "promised" the Left, he will indeed cause more problems for everyone. We're not talking about play school here. If America wants and voted for change, we're getting ready to see a bunch of it in a bad way. Change is often a good thing, but it can often be a bad thing if not thought out. I have never subscribed to "if it's not broken, don't fix it". I have always looked for ways to improve, but to improve...everyone needs to understand what exactly the end result should be...what is is involved and what effect will the change have on everyone...in the beginning, in the middle, and at the end.

You've got to try to envision the end-game. Just like a game of Chess.

We're in for a hell of a ride.

It's time to read, or read again, Atlas Shrugged.

Objectivism.

I watched Hannity tonight...solo...good line up...He told Meatloaf he would never let his daughter listen to Paradise by the Dashboard Light.

This is for her...

I find it interesting the ancient Maya predicted, thousands of years ago, the same thing NASA is (maybe) predicting today. The Maya predicted on 12/21/2012 at 11:11 p.m. Universal Time, the earth will experience some sort of solar anomaly.

Historically people have sensed the need to have a fixed point to start their time calculations. In order to do this generally the starting point has been determined either by a historical event (the birth of Jesus) or by a hypothetical event (the date of the world's creation). Of all known cultures the Maya seem to have been the first to discover the need for such a date, using probably an astronomically significant or a hypothetical event they placed at 3114 BC.

I'm not saying "Doom and Gloom", but what I am saying is..."Generally, you can not dispute mathematics". It is what it is.

I just find it interesting...that is all.

...let a 14 year old get on your computer when they truly believe they know more than you. Never ever believe that what they said they did is accurate. Just take whatever they say with a BIG grain of salt.

Introduce them to log files...proof positive.

You could also bitch slap 'em...this one needed it.

I cannot tolerate people who do not tell the truth.

Anyway, this has nothing to do with me taking a little vacation...I'm going to head over to the Juju crib for a while. Hanging with Yabu is interesting to say the least. He is shameless. No scruples whatsoever...but he does like him a good looking woman, and some home grown vegatables.

It is what it is.

I've flown a gazillion times in good and bad weather, but the 2nd to worse commercial flight I've ever been on involved a crosswind landing. Landing at DFW during a pretty good storm around dusk...I thought it might really be over. The pilot...well she did a bang up job of not killing us all...calm cool and collected is bullshit...because by the time I could thank her...she was visibly shaking. We were damn lucky, and she knew it.

The first time we touched down, everything flew out of the overhead compartments, the oxygen masks deployed, the older lady sitting next to me took a shit in her pants...people were crying and screaming...stuff was flying everywhere...it was a mess. A second or two later when we slammed into the runway again...it was chaos...but she was able to straighten the plane out and stop it. It was a Boeing 727, and it was a lucky day.

I have to admit...I thought I was a goner for a moment.

The pilot did a remarkable job; and to this day I believe she saved my life.

You cannot cheat the wind.

When I was growing up...me and my gang use to jump trains for kicks. We had a rail line that ran from the other side of the hill to who knew where. I missed a few...got aboard most...never fell onto the tracks under the wheels...but I have never hitched a ride like this.

Damn!!!

The very name Yucatan is derived from "uic aithan" the phrase spoken to the Spanish conquistadors by the Maya when asked what their land was called: it means "what do you say, we do not understand you".

[From Lost Languages by Andrew Robinson, 2002]

Everyone needs to know this.

7th post...didn't know what I was thinking.

How the times change...I think my math was wrong.

Gonna slink on over to my other crib for awhile.

Beating to weather...so to say

It is all about square footage.

This photo is of a fractional rig sloop, who some believe to be superior to a mast head rig. By using a fractional rig, you are able to rack the mast further aft, which allows a performance advantage in some conditions. To weather, you can make the sails flatter...which equates to speed. The large mainsail provides most of the power...upwind and downwind. The smaller head sail is easier to control for a smaller crew. On reaches, the spinnaker and bloopers are smaller, so you don't get the power or square footage of a masthead rig.

I prefer a masthead rig...takes more people to drive, but when you get it right...ain't nothing like it. Downwind, a masthead sloop with a Tri-radial spinnaker, and a nice Blooper are hard to beat. The thrill of getting the boat balanced is worth it, although, rounding marks can be very interesting. I'm telling you from experience...you can get your ass killed being a foredeck monkey on a nice boat in a good blow. Stuff happens fast...really really fast.

I started out as a sewer rat...moved to foredeck cat, and then to a trimmer. My decision...moved back (forward) to the foredeck because that it what I'm best at. Although, I can trim with the best...the fordeck is where the action is.

No good foredeck monkey...no win races.

I can also handle driving, but I yell at everyone too much because they're not doing it exactly like I would.

I can tie bunny knots and pack sails like you wouldn't believe.

Racing sailboats is a passion of mine.

I miss it....

This is on my short list...

"A test of will, courage and skill against the best (or more accurately, worst) nature has to offer." would be accurate. "The ultimate sailing adventure." would also be accurate.

I've followed these races since the early 70's. This is the Catdaddy of all. I would suspect you would be a changed person if you crossed the finish line.

This is not the America's Cup, where money determines how fast you can make it around a short triangular course.

This is about life...endurance, stamina, will, trust, and brotherhood.

Over Twenty Eight Thousand miles is a hell of a long race. Many things can happen.

This could be, in my opinion, the ultimate test of character. I would do it in a second.

Just my opinion.

This would be just about getting down with one of my favorite boats

In this photograph, they're obviously tight to weather, which is a smooth ride...but when you get her on a broad reach with a tri-radial spinnaker up...you'll be cooking with gas, so to say.

Of course, I do loves me a tight reach with a starcut...

Everything depends on the trim.

Awesome piece of the good times.

It takes a bunch of "like minded" people to drive one of these...but when you get in the groove...you are in the groove.

I need a helmet because it has been raining Acorns. They are falling so fast is it just plain dangerous to venture into my backyard. I must have a hundred thousand of them, or so. The year before last, I raked 'em and filled five, forty gallon garbage cans.

This year...I say fuck it!...they stay as they lay.

I was outside the other evening, enjoying a nice cigar and a glass of wine...Ka-Bamn...wine glass explodes. Direct hit from a fucking Acorn.

I kid you not...

...The man driven by his demons is the easiest of all to lead or corrupt through his desperation. The man content with himself and his world is least likely to succumb to temptation. Threaten the latter with that which he holds most dear and he will bend...

Domino senses and understands something of antitheses or mutual correlations in human perceptions going on...dual concepts...so to say.

Nothing is black and white. It is much more complicated.

Honor: is the evaluation of a person's trustworthiness. Can you keep an important secret to yourself?

Integrity: must be constantly proven over time. It is the basing of one's actions on principles and their honor.

Trust: is a moral value. It is someone in whom we can place our trust and rest assured that the trust will not be betrayed.

Loyalty is a combination of the above.

Betrayal is some Bad Bad Juju.

I'm just saying.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines Stamina as: Staying Power,,,Endurance.

I define Stamina as making it home safe and sound after three 4 o'clockers in a row at the Helen Blogmeet.

Damn, my ass is worn out.

More later...

Also, my woman took over 500 photographs...stay tuned.

Double also, if any of you attendees would like me to burn a CD for you, just shoot me your address in an email.

Be cool with it.

Yesterday evening, I called a good friend of mine. I told him, "you need to be the first to know". He said know what about what?" I said, "I'm whoring out your wife." He said, "really?". I said, "yes". He said, Can we make any money?" I said, "probably." He said "cool with me".

I have never thought of myself as a pimp, but you never know...

Bwahahahahah!!!!!!

I swear, I can't make this shit up!!!

I'm just saying...

Sam has too much banana

Yabu has way too much banana.

But, my boy Riprock...has got way too much Dick.

Bwahahthefuckinghahaha!!!

Is the grass always greener when you're looking in someone else's yard?

Just a thought.

...so is Fuck, or how many times can I say Fuck?

I use to be an avid golfer...three, four, maybe five times a week...but over the last several years...it has been once every two years or so.

I played with some friends today...can you say..."Fucking Circus"?

We pull up to the first tee. I pull my Driver out of my bag, and guess what comes out with it?...a fucking birds nest, thats what...there was a fucking birds nest in my fucking golf bag. Do you think they fucking laughed at that?...Damn.

We did the customary tee flip and it pointed to me, so I went first. My first ball went into outer space...my Mulligan went into the fucking woods....my third ball, the Clancy, went into the fucking parking lot. All this one in one out shit is confusing. My fourth ball went straight down the fucking fairway. After that, I had about 150 yards to the flag, and what do I do?...Smacked that fucker into nowhere land...un-fucking findable.

2nd hole tee box.

I'm last of course. What do I do?...I hit that fucking ball about 10,000 yards right down the middle of the fairway. I set up my second shot, and hit that fucker into the fucking lake. I drop another, and hit that fucker into the fucking woods...un-fucking findable.

3rd hole tee box. Par 3.

I hit a beautiful shot if you think landing right in the fucking middle of the fucking sand trap is a fucking good shot. Damn...I'm pumped. My second shot went into the fucking woods...un-fucking findable.

And so it goes...and on and on and on...for 15 more holes.

I lost every fucking ball in my fucking bag, but at least, I finished with all my clubs.

I fucking love fucking golf.

It is, what it is...

The first time I ever slow danced with my bitch, while her parents were watching, was to this song.

We were in the groove...couldn't keep our minds on anything but each other.

It was, and still is, good.

As Domino would say..."it is, what it is"

Back in the day, I did boo coo Nunchaku. I use to be quite proficient with two of 'em. I started "practicing again". I might be moving too fast too soon, because I just hit my elbow so fucking hard I was down on my knees in pain. Problem is...I tagged the same elbow I did last week. It was nowhere near healed.

Damn...that hurt...really really hurt.

Anyway, cool thing about the sticks is they can make a 4 footer equal to a 7 footer.

Always remember...you can't block what you can't see.

That reminds me of a ship (her name was VooDooToo) I passed at night...but that is another story altogether.

Nunchakus are pretty much the ultimate close in weapon...easy to conceal, and as efficient as you want them to be. You want to scare someone...no problem, you want to hurt someone...no problem, you want to kill 'em...no problem.

Whatever...time for a hot bath.

...one of these. A stainless (does not really matter if it is stainless or not) .357 is just a plain bad ass ride.

I'd also grab one of these while I was at it.

A Walther PPK is a bad ride as well...just doesn't have the punch of a .357.

Fuck it...get 'em both.

I really don't need either, because Stretch never leaves my side.

I'm just saying!!!

...and I ain't talking about sport fucking.

I happen to drive an automobile that feels as comfortable at 150 mph as making love to a beautiful woman without a rubber...but you do need some nice "real deal" tires. Better to be safe than sorry...right?

So, today I put a new set all around...took that bitch to 145...and everything was cool...sweet. I guess you get what you pay for....although when I signed the tab...I felt like I'd spent the night with Velociman.

Seriously...I'm ready to slow dance...

Bwahahahahah!!!!

The Drudge Report went with the headline "Brokeback Bathroom."

Larry Craig...is done.

Let it be said that we in The Brier Patch do not tolerate "Packing of the Fudge".

I feel bad for his wife...and worse for his mother

If a male and a female want to glide one in, in a airport bathroom...or wherever...I have absolutely no problem with that, but I do have a problem with queers. I think we should just shoot 'em, and be done with it.

Just my opinion.

I have many friends. Some tell me I'm full of shit...some I think are full of shit...but we're still friends. That's half the battle. I believe I'm always right, but in the larger scheme of things...maybe I'm not. Who knows? I love a good debate. At least I realize that. I actually like people who disagree with me, but I detest people who say they do when they don't or say they don't when they do...if you know what I mean. People interpret things in different ways. What might piss me off might not piss off someone else. Fine. Friendship is volatile, but above everything else...friendship must be true.

I'm just saying...friendship is earned, and there is honor in that. Friendship is mutual and reciprocal.

So, you might be thinking that I have some problems with my friends...quite the contrary...I was just thinking about how fortunate I am to have as many friends as I do...because if one has no friends, they really have nothing.

Now, on a serious note...I overdosed on Gooey Cake. Christina Sweetie Baby Honey Pie...next time you send me a package...send ammunition. It will be quicker.

Bwahahahahahahahah!!!!

Some people know I have a dog named Stretch. Most people don't know his middle name is Cornbread. Yes, in fact it is. He is registered as Stretch Cornbread. I did that when she wasn't looking. My woman told some friends I wanted to name my new puppy Cornbread...they asked her why, and she said, because he (me) likes cornbread. One of her friends said, "I like chicken, but I wouldn't name my dog after one".

Bwahahahahahah!!!!

To the point:

Stretch learns like a Velociraptor in a bad fiction movie. He is becoming much more proficient in his hunting skills. Today, he brought the granddaddy home...dead. I saw the last ten seconds of it.

I usually deal with my squirrel problem with a .177 hollow point, but that is no fun for Stretch. He loves the thrill of the chase. Boy dogs are like that.

He has learned how to work out the distance between the squirrel and the closest tree. The biggest and oldest squirrel in the neighborhood made a fatal mistake today. He is no more, and my dogie is strutting around like he owns the world.

It was a good kill.

I have always flown an American Flag from before Memorial Day to after Labor Day...also on Veterans Day, etc. I raised my flag, as I always have every year, a week before Memorial Day. 2001 was no different...it is still flying...it will never come down. After 9/11, everyone was flying the flag...not now...what happened? Why is that? Was it trendy?

I heard some people saying today, that if Hillary Clinton is elected president, they'll leave the country. Fuck that, if the Hildebeast is elected, we'll probably all have to evacuate...we'll be under attack with some bad stuff. I swear to the Maker, I will personally, if possible, make Alec Baldwin and Michael Moore, and all of their coward ass pussy friends, stay and inhale the germs and radiation. They should experience first hand what they're fighting for, ya think?

Many many years ago I obtained a Buck Titanium folding knife. 5 inches closed, 9 inches open. Sweet. It has been missing for a long time...I found it today...sweet.

I have / had a lot of computers. I'm cleaning my office, and after I removed multiple hard drives from seven or so machines...I worked over the insides with a crowbar, and I beat the ever loving shit out of what was left with a sledge hammer. They will never run again, trust me. On the advice of my friend Zonker, I kept a laptop. I'm gonna stake that fucker like I staked this one., and then do some horseshoes. The Zonkman is as crazy as I am.

I called the Junk Yard Dogs to come and haul off the mess I made today...with some other stuff. Anyway, I like their pricing scheme...based on refrigerators.

I always have a bunch of fireworks laying around. While making my mess today, I found a bunch of mortar shells, but I couldn't find the launching tube, so I fired 'em up and tossed like a grenade.

Big mistake...I set the fucking front yard on fire...I had to scream for my woman to bring on the hose. No shit, I set the front yard on fire...looked like something you'd see on the news. She had to put water on the yard, and the roof. I can tell you for certain, I have not heard the last of that.

Anyway, not much going on around here...just another day in the Brier Patch.

"A great civilazation is not conquered from without unitl it has destroyed itself from within"

- W. Durant

Of course I'm talking about "fill in the blank",,, if you would...can.

This is a rough sketch of Yabu and Domino drawn by John Cox...of Cox and Forkum.

This guy is amazing...he did this with no photos, as there are no known photographs of these two. It was all done verbally, and with a little written inspiration.

More later.

Domino can certainly put pen to paper.

Ya think?

A couple more below the fold.

I might have said something about this before.

I absolutely hate it when one of my neighbors fires up his fucking lawn mower at 7:00 am on a Saturday or Sunday morning, but I also hate how loud my bean grinder is...another but: It is my choice when I grind my beans. I have no control over the time my neighbors decide to cut their grass.

I'm thinking of a little early morning sugar in the tank mission.

Or, have Yabu horizontally launch some of his rocket stash at 'em.

I'm just sayin', Yabu WILL do it.

I can think it, but I can't put it to paper like Christina.

There is nothing else I can say...

Me: Stretch, there seems to be some dirt in the fuel line.

Stretch: I hate it when that happens.

Me: I'm a honorable and loyal man, and I hate it when I receive Hate Mail from someone I once considered to be a friend.

Stretch: Play her the song.

Me: OK...that is why you're my best friend...you dog you.

This is for you Bitch...you are Pretty Fucked Up

Right, wrong, or indifferent...I remember everything.

What's the best thing about dating a homeless girl?

My woman grew into some fairly serious food allergies about ten or eleven years ago. I'm talking Anaphylactic Shock kind of serious, as in three ambulance rides to the Emergency Room within two weeks. She could've easily died without the emergency medical treatments. Scary stuff. One time, I was standing at the end of her bed in the emergency room...she was surrounded by six or seven doctors, nurses and technicians, and her eyes rolled back and she rose up, and then collapsed. I thought she died, and I think they did as well. I will never, as long as I live, forget that.

She had the full battery of skin tests then...eighty plus pricks and under-skin injections on her back and arms, and it was determined she was MAJOR allergic to Soy, Peanuts, and all tree nuts. Soy is in fucking everything...even a Hershey's chocolate bar.

We adjusted our diets accordingly, and just dealt with it as best we could. We really could not go "out to eat" unless we went to a nice restaurant with a chef who knew EXACTLY what was in the food they prepared. For example, we generally make all of our bread...Soy is in 99.99% of bread. We had cards printed, in several languages, to give to the dumber than dumb-ass servers we usually encountered. For the last ten or eleven years I have read every label on everything I've purchased in every store. I upped my optical prescription because the fucking print is so small. Better than the alternative.

It changed my life just like hers. I do loves me my sweetie.

We adapted together. We had to...no choice. No big deal, actually it is a much bigger deal for the people we're around because they just don't seem to understand what Anaphylaxis is. Don't get me wrong...some do, but more do not.

Six years ago we moved from point A to B, and had the same tests done which provided the same results...Major life threatening reactions to Soy, Peanuts, and tree nuts. Oh well...business as usual...we decided to just keep on keeping on...actually, we had no choice.

Two weeks ago...we had the same tests done...same results, but this time I / we were a little more concerned because she tested major positive for tomatoes and onions, which we eat everyday...and green beans. It didn't make any sense, to me / us.

We were consulting with the doctor, and I was telling him basically he was a Voodoo Man and I was gonna put Yabu on his ass, and I / we didn't believe the diagnosis. There is no way she is allergic to some of the food groups she tested positive for...we eat 'em everyday. We were suspicious.

Bombshell:

He said maybe we should do some blood work.

Excuse me, but I said, "What the fuck are you talking about?" I don't care if it cost a million fucking dollars...do it...why didn't you do it before? The jury is still out on that one...I don't think the tests were available when this nightmare started...but I'm going to find out. Find out for certain. There will be no recourse; we just want to know.

My Sweetie goes in and gives 33 vials of blood...one for each food group that is suspect. The results come back with a BIG GOOSE EGG across the board. WTF is going on with that? The results state that she is allergic to NOTHING. They state that EVERY test she has had returned a false positive. WTF is going on with that?

11 Fucking Years!

There is no doubt that she went into Anaphylactic Shock on several occasions, but the cause was apparently misdiagnosed...multiple times. Something caused it for certain, but I don't think it was food...I think it was more likely environmental.

Two Days Ago:

She goes in for the Soy Challenge, because we just don't believe the results. The challenge is done in a controlled environment in the Allergists office or the emergency room...whatever is more convenient. I kid you not.

The doctor used Soymilk for this first test. His call. First they smeared some on her arm and checked it twenty minutes later, and then they put some on her lips, and then she drank a teaspoon, and then she drank a tablespoon, and then another tablespoon, and then she did a shot, and the she drank a cup...and there was no reaction. None Whatsoever.

What does this prove? I'm not sure, but I will say skin tests for food allergies are a bunch of voodoo. You are just as likely to have a false positive as not. Go for the blood work.

Note: We used several different doctors in different states, but until the blood analysis became available, we lived a different life.

Am I pissed? Yes and no. Are we going to pursue this, as in going after anyone? Absolutely not. Are we better cooks? Absolutely.

The next challenge (July) will be peanuts.

Life is good my friends, just understand we had second and third, and fourth, and fifth opinions...and they all got it wrong...except for this last guy.

This will be a life changing experience for us...in a positive way, but she will always have epinephrine with her, in an EpiPen. Always.

I am such a dumb ass, and slow to catch on.

If you're in the presence of Christina, and she flips you the peace sign...extended index and bird finger...she doesn't mean Peace...she means Strike Two, or your ass is real damn close to being put in Time Out...or worse.

Bwahahahahahahahah!

I am honored to have been flipped by her. She runs an efficient, but tight, ship.

I kid you not, and her children will agree.

Wee One to Zonker and I.

"You look like Won Tons. Me, really?... Wee One, yes, and I'm gonna fry you up...Me, really?...Zonker...no? Wee One...Yes...and then she looks at me with those beautiful slang eyes and says..."I'm gonna fry you first because you're smaller"

By the way, Zonker was on his knees...and he was damn near as tall as me...I was swearing him in for the weekend.

Damn, I can't make this up.

My little buddy Wee is a pistol; which ,I guess, goes hand in hand if you're from TEXAS.

Bwahahahahahahahahahahah....

I do loves me a cute girl.

I rarely post a comment I've received...but this one is too good not to.

It was on this post.

I am so sick and tired of hearing about global warming. I think it's become a religion for those on the left, I really do. I also think global warming is a load of bullcrap considering the fact that Mars itself is also suffering from "global warming," too. Is man the cause of global warming? Hell, is man the cause of global warming on Mars? Could it be our nasty SUV's? Or could it be the sun is going through a cycle of shining hotter, not to mention expansion? No, that wouldn't have anything to do with what's going on. Yes, our planet is a little warmer than it's has been, but so what? It's all normal and it'll level itself out.

By the way, someone really needs to ask the global warming crowd as to whatever in the hell happened to their global cooling fiasco of the 1970's. Remember when they said that we were heading for an ice age? Uh huh, whatever happened to that? Not a liberal lunatic is to be heard, anywhere.

And why in the f*ck should I subscribe to the liberal left's accusations of us (us, being mankind) being the cause of global warming when our own weather forecasters cannot even accurately predict the weather four days in advance? The hell with global warming. It's nothing more than a religion involving the acquisition of political power, nothing more, nothing less. And really, why doesn't O-Zone Al Gore set a REAL, SOLID example if he believes that mankind is the cause of global warming. Why doesn't he cut back on his $30,000.00 a year utlility bills? Why doesn't he stop getting his ass hauled around in jet planes too? Nope. Why? Because when you're a liberal Democrat, it's *just* different. Do as I say, but not as I do.

Here's another interesting bit for those who subscribe to the left's take on global warming:

The polar ice caps are just that, ice. Ice which is floating on water. Ice which is displacing water as it floats. Think of a hot cup of tea which you drop an ice cube or two into in order to cool it off. Since the ice cube(s) are already displacing the water, the water doesn't run over. The same goes for the polar ice caps. If...and it's a big IF the polar ice caps were to completely melt, no flooding of our coastal cities would occur. Why? Because the ice caps themselves have already displaced the water they've been in. That's another thing no one ever asks people like O-Zone Al.

Al Gore can take global warming and shove it all up his big you know what.

And that's my final answer. :-)

P.S. Sorry for the "novel" of a comment.

Posted by Braden at May 9, 2007 08:37 PM

"She tore apart the chest cavity, ripped out the heart and ate it," ... "It was like she knew that's what kept it alive."

A little something to have with your coffee...or understand about women.

Never, Ever, take a leak after cutting a Habanero.

...but still true

Bwahahahahahahah!!!

This guy and his buddies didn't get where they were by being stupid.

[O]f course, the people don't want war. Why would some poor slob on a farm want to risk his life in a war when the best that he can get out of it is to come back to his farm in one piece. Naturally, the common people don't want war; neither in Russia nor in England nor in America, nor for that matter in Germany. That is understood. But, after all, it is the leaders of the country who determine the policy and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy or a fascist dictatorship or a Parliament or a Communist dictatorship. . . . [V]oice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country.

--Hermann Goring

Does this remind you of anything?

Damn!!!

What A Dumbass

The shooting occurred moments after Paige told the children that he was the only person in the room professional enough to carry the weapon.

Now he is suing. Give me a break.

It is strange the way the ignorant and inexperienced so often and so undeservedly succeed when the informed and the experienced fail.

--Mark Twain

Is it all about the money?

What happens if we don't do this?

The sad fact about this deal is that it makes one think of that old saying that capitalists are so intent on a profit that they would eagerly sell you the rope with which you intend to hang them.

Shut 'em down? The points of entry that is. I don't think so.

I understand the deal, and I'm against it.

We can do it without the United Arab Emirates.

I personally think the Nation of Islam (and I'm not talking about Louis Farrakhan) should have absolutly nothing to do with anything American.

Have we lost our minds?

Bottom line is that we're about to outsource more than goods...security...and it will be a problem. We only need to make one mistake, and the Islamofascists know that. They are waiting in the wind.

When approved...this will be a huge mistake.

via The Grouchy Old Cripple

You're a scientific intellectual.


What Sort of Intellectual Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I'm old enough to know better and too young to resist.

That is a fact.

You've got to try this.

Stretch's Buddies

This grew overnight.

My man who drives the Tight Ass Cadillac has tagged me.

That is cool with me.

Here goes:

What were three of the stupidest things you have done in your life?

1. Adding just a little more gunpowder, like Emeril 'kicks it up a notch'. Blew up the garage, and damn near burned the house down.

2. Jumping off the Seven Mile Bridge in the Keys. I almost died that day. Trust me: It is a long way down, and there were sharks waiting. That was really a close call.

3. Entering into a relationship with the Daughter of the Devil. People say there are two main problems in life. Money and Women. I’m here to tell you; that bitch was some bad medicine; it had nothing to do with cash.

At the current moment, who has the most influence in your life?

My wife. She has the perfect disposition. Enough said. I am a lucky man.

If you were given a time machine that functioned, and you were allowed to only pick up to five people to dine with, who would you pick?

1. Sitting Bull

2. Sun-Tzu

3. Winston Churchill

4. Christopher Columbus

5. Marco Polo

If you had three wishes that were not supernatural, what would they
be?

1. No need for a job.

2. The ability to participate in the Whitbread around the world race.

3. No reading glasses

Someone is visiting your hometown/place where you live at the moment.
Name two things you regret your city not having, and two things people should
avoid.

1. No airport.

2. No 'Mom and Pop' Italian Restaurants

Name one thing that has changed your life.

Broadband. Plain and simple.

***UPDATE***

I tag my good friends Dax Montana and Dash Riprock.

I've posted about my love of squirrels on many occaisions.

The Baboon Pirate witnessed a Two-Fer this morning.

Bwahahahah!!!!!

Sometimes I receive comments on an old post. I put this one up on 12/04/2003.

The question is:

Is there such a thing as an original thought?

The response I received a short while ago was:

"Any attempted original thought is simply a modification of an old one or a new application of and existing one, similarllly an invention is just a modification, addition of, or a compilation of existing stuff. A genuine invention would contain an original thought(s)"

Interesting.

As you know, Dick Penn sunk his rescue boat as he set out on his rescue mission with his rescue entourage and rescue documenters. Problem is, they didn't have enough room in the boat to rescue a turtle.

Hypocrite! He should have stayed in Iran. Fucking Traitor!

They all got wet.

The plug is useful for more things than sticking it up your ass.

Dumbass!

Bwhahahah!!!

My Internet Chic is Hard Core.

I love that woman.

Here's the link to the The Times-Picayune.

For obious reasons, and for the first time ever, they can only publish electronically.

They get a little more personal, and go a little deeper, than the nationals.

Check 'em out.

Not that it matters, but...

...I've been negligent lately...been really really busy.

Anyway, I met this woman in New Orleans...she is downtown, she is cool, she is a keeper. She is so rolled!!! I'm calling her the "Attractive Stranger".

Why? Because I can.

"No real gentleman will tell the naked truth in the presence of ladies."

- Mark Twain

Check out the COUNTDOWN on my left sidebar.

Stretch is learning how to fly.

Let me set this up.

I’m doing some work in my office this morning…Stretch is asleep on the couch in the other room... all is calm.

All of a sudden I hear him go ballistic. I bolt for the den, and as I turn the corner, I see my damn puppy flying through the air about eight feet high. He busted his ass when he landed. I mean…busted it.

In that split second, I was tense. I thought someone threw him…how else could he be flying a foot lower than the ceiling? I’m thinking, I’m two feet from a gun…good…where’s the person who threw him.

In the split second after he busted his ass on landing, he was on the top of the back of the chair…balanced. At that instant, I saw two flashes…one from each eye. The first one made me duck…it was a reflex…bird in the house. The second one made me sprint like a wide receiver. Stretch, who resembles a football with ears when he’s flying about head level, dove at that damn bird as it flew by...and was headed for another bad landing. The bird missed, I missed, and Stretch missed, and busted his ass again. Big time.

I’m not going to bore you with the rest of this story, but suffice to say…it was hilarious.

A Daschund is resourceful, fearless, determined, and stubborn. At least, mine is.

I’m still smiling.

It won't be long before I head up to the Blue Ridge Mountains in Virginia to watch the annual migration of the Red-Tailed hawks. From late August until late October, you can see 'em soaring above the ridges, heading south. Prior to their migration, you usually only see one or two at a time, but when they fly south; they do it in force. It is not uncommon to see hundreds, together. A magnificent sight. Anyone who has seen this knows what I'm talking about. They'll do the return trip in late March or early April.

Red-tails can grow to 25 inches in length, have a wingspan of 52 inches, and weigh three pounds. During the summer months, when the birds suddenly stop singing and all but disappear, you can bet there's a RTH in the neighborhood. I once saw one take a dove out of my garden, and all that was left was a crater. I kid you not...it hit that dove so hard...dirt was flying.

I like to watch stuff like that.

What do a Ping-Pong ball and some fishhooks have to do with your digestive system?

Go here to find out.

I’m glad this guy is a friend of mine. Damn glad!

I Want To Talk About Pain

I’m really trying to determine how to best deal with comment and ping spammers. I like MT, the MySQL database, the interface, etc… and I’m not switching, period. I like my host (Hosting Matters), and I’m not switching.

Hosting Matters is evaluating and testing a security module that intercepts comment / ping requests before the actual request is made to the script on individual blogs. They are also considering incorporating a master blacklist of known spammer domains into the security module. The effect of this would be to block requests that are spammish in nature. The master list would be pulled in by every server on a set, automated schedule, just as the email spam lists are. This will allow them to easily add entries to the master list quickly and have those changes rolled out without having to go to every server.

Although I don’t completely agree with this, it has become, or is becoming, a necessary evil. I’m downtown with it.

But,

That’s not what this post is about. I want to talk about pain, and I’m asking for your input.

I want to discuss Torture.

The scenario is: I capture a spammer(s), alive, and I’m going to share ‘em with you.

How do we kill ‘em? What is the most painful way to die? How long will it take? The longer, the better…you think?

If you were the devil, how would you do it? Behead them immediately? Inflict continuous pain until they expire? Let them live their lives knowing when they die a natural death…they’re going to hell, or worse?

I’ve never asked for a comment or ping, but this time…I want to know.

What Is Worse?

Walking with a full cup of coffee (as far away from any place to sit it down as possible) and having to sneeze?

Or,,,

If The Brier Patch scares you beyond belief, mentally scars you, and makes you want to destroy your computer…you probably should. I would suggest throwing it out of a third floor window…I’ve done it before; and it works every time.

Following is an email I received.

Dear Mr(s) Moore, I am writing to inform you that recently your site scared me beyond belief. My name is also Sam Moore and being an MSN user, I was searching for a display picture. A simple noose was what I was searching for when this happened when I searched for the word noose: As you can see your site is the first result and was perfect for a display picture. When I followed the link and found the address needless to say I was mentally scarred and for a brief moment destroying my computer was seeming a good idea. Just a quick note to tell you this and how you made my day enjoyable, but at the same time making me appreciate the value of life in this small world. Thanks for taking the time to read my e-mail.

Love Sam Moore

P.s. Are you a male or female Sam Moore, in either case wanna meet up for a drink sometime? MSN me if interested, or e-mail.

And NO, I don’t want to meet up for a drink anytime.

Cyberspace is fascinating, don’t you think?

It is all about communicating.

I have a tendency to leave the screen door in the kitchen wide open.

This afternoon, I noticed a note attached to the screen that read, “Shut the dam door.”

I informed my wife that she misspelled “damn”, and headed out on patrol with Stretch.

When we returned, there was a new note, which read:

"Shut the F___king Door!!!"

Oh Well!

Bwahahaha…

My 1100 fps .177 Benjamin is bad to the bone, and (almost) silent. Yesterday, I popped another two, maybe three, rats with bushy tails. At a decent range, I must add. I don't know where they're coming from; but make no mistake, I'm under attack, and I intend to win.

Between Stretch and me, they don't stand a chance.

Bastards

...or Three Mile Island

I just returned from some major debauchery here (photos below).

Business, real business…as in closing the damn bars every night. My ass is worn out, plain and simple.

I usually don’t sleep well in hotels, but the Hotel Hershey is different. They actually have comfortable beds with all the down. I’m down with the down. I slept like a drunken baby, but like I said, my ass is trashed. I get up with these people about once a year, and trying to squeeze 362 days into 3, is a "crash and burn" situation if I've ever seen one. Did I tell you, my ass is dead?

Anyway, to get there, you fly into Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, and the Three Mile Island Nuclear Plant is, literally, at the end of the runway. There are no federal regulations limiting how close you can fly to it. If there were, they'd have to shutdown the airport. No can do.

Three Mile Island forced us to evaluate how groups of people react and make decisions under stress. Some believe the accident was exacerbated by incorrect decisions made because the operators were overwhelmed with too much information. Some believe it was operator error, without regard for the data. Much of the information from the sensors was irrelevant, misleading, or incorrect.

After the TMI incident, nuclear reactor operator training changed. Before TMI, operator training focused on diagnosing the underlying problem, apparently with bad data. Afterwards, the training focused on reacting to the emergency by going through a standardized checklist to ensure that the core is receiving enough coolant. The key is: You've got to keep the core cool. In my opinion, this is the opposite of thinking out of the box, but in some scenarios; thinking out of the box might not be the best thing. The Monkey Checklist, sometimes, might be a good thing.

It took the operators 16 hours to realize they had a major problem, because they had too much information. Right, wrong, or indifferent; they had too much information.

Too much information is something to think about. Sometimes, it's not a good thing.

Conversation with Wife:

Me: Listen to me, I am the voice of reason.

Her: Bullshit!

Man...I love her.

I'm headed out to hobble through some airports. My toe is Whacked, with a CAPITAL W.

About three quarters through my four and a half hour telephone call with this guy, Stretch comes running inside with some nasty looking shit. On closer examination, I realized it was the torso (no head or front or rear legs) of a damn squirrel.

The day before, it was pouring cats and dogs, and I looked out from my kitchen door over Kill Zone One, and saw a damn rat with a bushy tail peering out of a hole in a tree about thirty-five yards away. I pumped the .177, drew a bead, and capped it right between the eyes. There was no way I thought I could make that shot in a severe thunderstorm. I fired up the binoculars, and sure enough, half his head was blown away. I felt so good about that hit; I shot it again, removing most of the rest of its head.

So now the dead ass squirrel is hanging half in, and half out of the hole, and I thought it was probably high enough that I wouldn’t smell it as it rotted. I checked before I went to bed, and it was still there. I checked when I awoke, and it was gone. Stretch and I did a patrol, and it was not on the ground. He would’ve found it. How did he find it seven hours later, and what snagged it during the night? Hell if I know.

So what does popping a squirrel have to do with a four and a half hour phone call? I’ll tell you what; I didn’t think I could make that shot, and I damn sure didn’t think I could have a telephone call of that length with someone I’ve never met face to face. I enjoyed every second of it, and if anyone has any questions about anything, just give one of us a shout, because we solved ‘em all.

Bloggers are cool.

Just Damn!

I've got a new blaze on my skates, or tires on my ride, or whatever.

Cost me an arm, leg, and half my dick, but they are sticky.

Feels good.

Yeap...I just downshifted from a number three, to a number two, all the way around.

It feels good.

...or Spring Is In The Air.

The Dogwoods and Azaleas are blooming, the birds are chirping, my car is now greenish yellow, and I’ve been sneezing about a thousand times a day. I love this time of year, really I do.

Due to the Jekyll Island diversion, via a couple of days and nights in Charleston, I’ll be setting out my garden later than usual. I’m going to till the same size, but instead of a hundred tomato and pepper plants, I’m going to plant about sixty. Over the last several years, I’ve apparently planted everything too close together. I guess I was trying to get greedy with Mother Nature, so this year I’m going for pod size and longevity, not quantity. The last time I did it right, I still had fresh Habaneros in November. A fluke? Probably, but what the hell, it worked.

As for my squirrel problem, between Stretch and my new pellet gun, it no longer exists. The squirrels must know my garden is right, smack damn dab, in the middle of Kill Zone One. Believe it or not, they aren’t stupid, and the ones that aren’t dead, have moved out of the neighborhood, so to speak. I’m sure I’ll get a few more, but for all intents and purposes, they’re done. When Stretch is on patrol, the rats with tails stay in the trees, which makes for a safer shot. I don’t want to accidentally shoot the neighbor’s kid, know what I mean. Don’t let anyone tell you a lead pellet won’t ricochet. Stretch and I are a team; we work well together. He trees ‘em, and I pop ‘em. I just wish I had a Badger for him; so he could test his genes.

He is a Dog.

Happy Birthday Rotten.

How did this, become this, in one year?

He definitely lets me know when I need to reach for this.

…but, I wish the media would get their ducks in a row.

The Pope is dead…wait a minute, he is not dead, his brain is still functioning…wait a minute, the Pope is dead…wait a minute, he’s still alive…wait a minute…let us backpedal, because “we really don’t know what the fuck we’re talking about”. We're just spewing shit in an effort to make the ratings.

Assholes...

Is this about a scoop, which would be impossible, or is the media just plain fucking incompetent?

Damn!!!

I haven't blogged about Schiavo, and I'm not going to. I've talked to many people, and they're all over the place. Left to Right, and Right to Left. I usually never hesitate to take on complex issues, but, in my opinion, this is different. I'm not exactly sure about this one, so I'm going to think about it some more. I'm not talking about her death; I think that should have happened a long time ago. Anyway, it is complicated, and I need more time to think. This whole Schiavo mess is about much more than dying.

Think for a moment about a Living Will.

I can understand how, under certain circumstances, and for some people, it becomes more complicated.

I’m trying to understand all sides, because this particular case is not a two-sided coin; it’s a cube.

Personally for me, pull the plug. It’s the decision others have to make for you, if you don’t have a Living Will, that bothers me.

What makes a Living Will legal?

My friend KEY poses some interesting questions with this reality.

I’ve been following the saga about drinking and driving over at my buddy Catfish’s place, and I’ve got to say: drinking and driving is just plain stupid. I’ve had too many friends die, because they were stupid. I know people who’ve killed other people, because they were stupid. I’ve known some people who couldn’t live with that, so they killed themselves. What a waste.

Call a cab, and if there are no cabs, call a friend, and if you have no friends, sleep in a ditch, but whatever you do, don’t get in the drivers seat of your car. It is not worth the risk to other people, and to you. Everything will be better in the morning.

Let me tell you about a couple of smart girls.

My wife and I were celebrating New Year’s Eve, downtown, in some city one year, and at 3:00 am. we wanted a cab. It was damn cold; we had no car, and there were not enough cabs to go around. Strangers were becoming best friends as they plotted routes home, splitting fares, and hoping for the next taxi. There were not enough cabs to go around, so these two nice young ladies we’d just met, made a command decision.

They called a “Toe Truck”. I told them they were thinking out of the box, and one of ‘em replied, “It’s going to cost a little more, but when I wake up tomorrow, at least I’ll have my car”. That’s my kind of girl.

Anyway, my wife and I ended up walking three miles home, but at least we could. There wasn’t enough room in the cab of the wrecker for all.

Yes I am...against ignorance that is.

I could care less what someone’s race, color, or creed is; but I’m intolerant of stupidity.

I see a lot of futility in the world today. I see many people who agree, or disagree, with issues, for the sake of appearing informed. This is dangerous. You either are, or are not, informed; there is no happy medium. If you are in the middle, at least, research the topic sufficiently to form an opinion…or shut the fuck up.

Arguing with someone, just for the sake of arguing, is a waste of time and energy, especially if your challenger is trying to prove something to him or herself. Some people are so insecure, they’ll “go stupid” for all the wrong reasons.

Do you know what I mean?

...that February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon, or that you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights.

Or that, the words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left.

Or that, the sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.

Or that...

For the sake of simplicity.

A B C D E F

I know a lot of people who can’t think out of the box. If they have to step through B, C, D, and E, to get from A to F, and there is a problem with one of the B-E’s, they can’t seem to make it.

This pisses me off. I have a hard time dealing with people with narrow minds. Use your imagination, think about it, and improvise. Nothing is ever certain, so change the rules if you need to.

Problem solving is a fact of life, and if you can’t solve ‘em, (for example) you’ll be managing fries in a fast food joint. Fries (A) cook for the same amount of time (B), every time. A to B, and B is the end.

Just a thought.

Anyway, I was thinking about problems, and I realized that I always solve 'em. Why is that? It's because I'm not afraid to think out of the box. I take nothing for granted, nor do I ever give up. I also realize that the solution is, more often times than not, unorthodox. There are many ways to achieve the same result, but if you can't think out of the box, you'll never know it.

If you can get from A to F without B - E, go for it, but you'll never know unless you can think out of the box.

Take a chance, after all; what do you have to lose?

As Queenie says,

"The Terri Schiavo case sparked some of the most interesting discussions I've seen in the blogosphere since before the three-year-nightmare that was the 2004 General Election."

For whatever reasons, I'm not going to touch it, but you should give this a read.

She cuts to the chase.

KNOW YOUR STATE MOTTO

Alabama
Hell Yes, We Have Electricity.

Alaska
11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!

Arizona
But It's A Dry Heat.

Arkansas
Literacy Ain't Everything.

California
By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda.

Colorado
If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother.

Connecticut
Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedy's Don't Own It Yet.

Delaware
We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water.

Florida
Ask Us About Our Grandkids.

Georgia
We Put The Fun In Fundamentalist Extremism.

Hawaii
Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru
(Death To Mainland Scum,Leave Your Money)

Idaho
More Than Just Potatoes...
Well, Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good

Illinois
Please, Don't Pronounce the "S"

Indiana
2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free

Iowa
We Do Amazing Things With Corn

Kansas
First Of The Rectangle States

Kentucky
Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

Louisiana
We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign.

Maine
We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster

Maryland
If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It (ain't this the truth!)

Massachusetts
Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's

Michigan
First Line Of Defense From The Canadians

Minnesota
10,000 Lakes...And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes

Mississippi
Come And Feel Better About Your Own State

Missouri
Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work

Montana
Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-wing Crazies, and Very Little Else.

Nebraska
Ask About Our State Motto Contest

Nevada
Hookers and Poker!

New Hampshire
Go Away And Leave Us Alone

New Jersey
You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto
Right here!

New Mexico
Lizards Make Excellent Pets

New York
You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney...

North Carolina
Tobacco Is A Vegetable

North Dakota
We Really Are One Of The 50 States!

Ohio
At Least We're Not Michigan

Oklahoma
Like The Play, But No Singing

Oregon
Spotted Owl...It's What's For Dinner

Pennsylvania
Cook With Coal

Rhode Island
We're Not REALLY An Island

South Carolina
Remember The Civil War? Well, We Didn't Actually Surrender Yet

South Dakota
Closer Than North Dakota

Tennessee
The Edyoocashun State

Texas
Se Hablo Ingles

Utah
Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Vermont
Ay, Yep

Virginia
Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

Washington
We have more rain than you do

West Virginia
One Big Happy Family...Really!

Wisconsin
Come Cut The Cheese!

Wyoming
Where Men Are Men... And The Sheep Are Scared

…said Teresa Heinz Kerry. Bullshit, she’s just pissed because her cell phone number was listed under Arrogant Dyke in Paris Hilton’s Blackberry.

This post is for Acidman.

Unfortunately, I’ve had a lot of experience with death and grief. I was a pallbearer twelve times before I reached 29 years of age, and many more times after that. Joss.

But, one’s mother is different. My heart reaches out to you my friend, because I know what you’re feeling. I had a bunch of inner-family stuff going on during my similar situation. Crazy stuff.

A couple of years ago, I lost my mother. When I found out she was terminal, I immediately got Hospice involved. It was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made, for her, for me, and for everyone else. I cannot say enough good things about the folks at Hospice. They ensured my mother didn’t suffer, and they were there for my family and me. It was a good thing. I never realized how much I needed them, until I needed them. That’s hard for me to say, because I’ve never needed anybody. I thought I could handle everything alone, and maybe I could have, but I didn’t have to. Looking back, I’m glad I didn’t try to go it alone.

I’m not being philosophical, but death is a part of life, in a way. Everyone turns the final corner.

May she not suffer.

Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the THINKS you can think up if only you try. - Dr. Seuss

Happy Birthday Dr. Seuss

Dr. Seuss, creator of the Cat in the Hat and Sam, I Am, would be 101 today.

Green Eggs and Ham...

In response to that question from Christina.

I�m a news junky, and have been surfing since the pre AOL 1.0 days. Before broadband, I had an ISDN line installed in my home, not for the small speed advantage it provided, but for the stability. It never went down, and back in those days, that was a major deal.

Obviously, I found Glenn Reynolds and the Blue Eyed Infidel, and from there, Acidman and Dax. Reading these last two folks gave me a whole new perspective on what was, or was not, acceptable. I thought, �these people are wide open, and I like it.� I think I�ll get in the game.

I realized there is no set style, and anything goes, out here in cyberspace. I was attracted to that. It�s more of means to store my personal journals; especially about experiences I�ve had in the past, and bitch about current and past events that I have an opinion about. If someone wants to read it, fine, if not, that�s fine as well. I�m not blogging for anyone but myself, because I enjoy it, and get some personal gratification from doing it.

I try to lead people to the source of my opinions, so that they may develop their own, although, I�ve not been entirely successful with this. I�ve been complimented, and I�ve been threatened, and I don�t give a shit about the threats.

As far as the money goes, you can run a blog for a month, for less than a bar tab on your way home from work one day.

Like you, I�ve also made some real friends doing this. At least, I think I have.

Well, there you have it.

I’ve been fortunate enough to meet him and him.

I wish I could write like this.

Powerful, and affirming, is an understatement.

I'm just saying.

I second this.

Enough I say.

Have you ever wondered why small groups of intelligent people seem to make all the difference in the world?

Why is that?

Do you belong to a small, or large group?

I’m just thinking.

Windows is more unstable than my mailman.

If that's possible.

I've been seriously down on "Windows" lately, but I've got to tell you; Windows is a piece of shit. Trying to tweak Windows is like crawling over broken glass.

Click…click…checkbox…another checkbox.

Windows XP should be renamed to Windows Dumbass.

Painful.

There is nothing like a good night’s sleep. The bedroom is a place to truly live in and enjoy.

A restful and refreshing deep sleep is dependant on many things, but without a comfortable bed, you can’t get one. A good night’s sleep, that is.

I know people who are still sleeping on the same mattress and box springs they’ve had for twenty years, or more. Cheap Asses. Do yourselves a favor, and upgrade the environment in which you should spend, at least, 33% of your time.

A friend of mine has a NASA certified mattress, you know, the one you can put a glass of wine on, jump up and down, and not spill it. I tried it out, and it was too comfortable. I felt like I was a dummy for a concrete mold. I couldn’t roll over; it felt like I was in quicksand or something. This is bullshit. I like an old-fashioned rig like mine, and remember size does matter.

I have a queen size sleigh bed, made of cherry, waist high, that weighs about 8 million pounds. My box springs are tight, and the mattress is the firmest I could find.

On top of that is a goose down feather bed. This is a must.

Sheets: All 100 % cotton, but depending on the season; flannel, T-sheets, or regular. If you haven’t tried T-sheets, you need to get all over ‘em, or in ‘em. It’s like being wrapped in a tee shirt that’s been washed a thousand times. I use the same type of pillowcases, as I do sheets. Some people don’t.

Quilts and Comforters, I’ve got so many to choose from, I can never make up my mind.

People, this is a science.

My wife wants a crossbow. A real "bad" one, with a scope.

How cool is that?

I'm just saying, again.

Russian President Vladimir Putin said that Moscow will continue its nuclear cooperation with Iran and that he is convinced Tehran does not intend to develop atomic weapons.

What? Is he crazy, or just need some cash?

"...The spread of nuclear weapons on the planet does not aid security, it does not strengthen security. The latest steps from Iran confirm that Iran does not intend to produce nuclear weapons and we will continue to develop relations in all spheres, including the peaceful use of nuclear energy," Putin said at a meeting with Iranian National Security Council chief Hassan Rowhani...'

More bullshit here.

I don’t know shit about Cowboy Boots, but this is true.

I went looking for a nice pair, out west, with my good friend from Texas. He advised me to wear the thinnest pair of socks I had, and buy the tightest fitting boots I could stand. He further advised, that after I had ‘em on, I should stand in a creek until they were soaked, and not take ‘em off until they were dry.

I did it.

He was right.

Absolutely the most comfortable pair of “shoes” I’ve ever had.

Acidman raises an interesting question.

If you had to forfeit one sense, which one would it be?

Sight
Sound
Taste
Touch
Smell

Like him, I'll have to think about this one for a while.

But, if you had to give up one, which would it be?

Or, better yet, if you could only keep one, which would it be?

I received the following comment to this post, which wasn't even a post; it was a photo.

"I remeber when i was a little one and none of this mattered. All of this fighting in the world is not helping any of us. I just wish that everything was back to normal and we could just smoke weed in the parking lots like we used to. (LOL) :)

I just thought it was funny. There's something to be said for keeping those comments open.

Charlie Daniels responds to the statement made by Ward Churchill defending the rights of Al Qaida.

I agree with him.

This brings back some memories.

I've had my ass smacked so hard I can still feel it.

A good friend of mine has some great talking points for Washington Gun Law letters.

Give 'em a read.

In this day and age, everyone, at some point, requires technical support. That’s a fact.

I like to read stupid shit, so, I was trolling around through some online support forums today, when I came across the following:

“Your service has been highly recommended to me, and I was thinking about signing up, but your help desk doesn’t use telephones. You only use email? If I have a question, how can it be answered without talking to a human? Sorry, I’ll take my business elsewhere.”

WTF?

Would you rather dial an 800 number, punch about 97 digits into the keypad, which may or may not connect you to a human, who will probably not know what you’re talking about, and transfer you to another number where you’ll have to repeat the 97-digit deal…

OR

Would you like to send a concise email and get a response that actually solves your problem? Many of these help desk folks can read minds, so the email can be as scattered as your thinking. The number one qualification for help desk people is they must be able to deal with idiots without laughing out loud….the electronic e-mail solution was born for a reason...

I’m just saying

Iraq's interim Prime Minister Ayd Allawi said following the weekend's elections:

"The terrorists have been defeated."

What?

Wishful thinking...Allawi sounds like Hanoi John, or the Swimmer.

I guess the U.S. should pack up and go home. Mission Accomplished.

Kerry said the Iraq Election: "Was No Big Deal"

What?

Remember, Hanoi John dismissed the Iraqi election on Sunday, warning Americans not to "overhype". In his "expert" opinion, it was no big deal.

What?

"No one in the United States should try to overhype this election," Kerry told NBC's "Meet the Press."

I know Traitor John is rested after vacationing on Mars, but he is like crabs in a college dorm...he just won't go away.

Might have to burn everything.

What an arrogant asshole.

I don't mind the snow. The Ice is another matter altogether

My puppy Stretch has started barking like a real boy dog. This is a huge step for him, and he seems to enjoy his newfound genetic ability. He's bad, and hilarious. He is a fairly small dog, and he struts his small ass up to what he considers the point of no return, and does his thing. It is too damn funny...he puts so much into it, he moves backwards about 3 or 4 inches from the recoil. He can't even figure out what's going on. Looks like a damn cannon.

Too funny.

Three questions:

Do you blog for yourself, or do you blog for what you believe others will think of you?

Do you want people to read your personal thoughts and opinions, or do you want the traffic?

What do you hope to gain from blogging?

Honest Questions?

What the fuck is it with the munu comments? Why can't they remember me?

Someone needs to fix that shit. Pain in the ass.

I'm curious, what makes munu attractive? Why would I host my blog with a service that dosen't work?

Someone please tell me.

Damn Damn Damn

...a liberal stranglehold on the intellectual aspects of society... This is a great post.

"Anything that can't go on, won't."

We should all think about this.

This is not good news.

Back when Clinton was President, and during Desert Storm, I was living across the street from the runway at Dobbins AFB. I saw just about every plane in our armed force's inventory, and I believe an A-6 Intruder is the loudest. They scream. The planes on final were only a couple hundred feet above my deck, and every time the car alarms went off, you could bet it was an A-6.

Anyway, that’s not my point. My point is:

President Clinton was coming to Atlanta to spew some of his illustrious bullshit, and every radio station in town broadcast the exact time Air force 1 would be landing. I walked out on the deck, and sure enough, Air Force 1 flew right over. It was so low; I could’ve probably hit it with a rock. If I’d had a missile, he would’ve been a goner, and I could’ve made an easy escape. Since these IslamoFascists don’t care if they escape or not, we’ve got a genuine problem.

I hate to say it, but I think it’s going to happen sooner, rather than later.

I believe people who subscribe to this train of thought are idiots. This stupidity usually occurs in the Information Technology arena, but can often be found in other area's. Procedures, etc...

A person bragged to me the other day, that he lives by that creed.

I thought to myself, "what a dumbass."

If anyone ever says that to me again, I will bitch slap them into submission.

Can you tell what kind of day I had?

I know so many people who just can’t seem to grasp that concept. They are complacent. They move through every day like it was yesterday, afraid to accept anything new or different. A challenge? No way. A shortcut? No way. Doing anything different? No way. Can a variation from a routine be positive? No way. Can anything be improved upon by changing the rules? No way.

How boring can you be?

I say you should spice it up a bit. Accept some responsibility, and eat a Habanero. Come on people...make your temples itch. Do not be afraid to be different, or honest. Going with the flow will usually get you screwed.

If I didn’t think out of the box, I’d be managing “fries” in a fast food joint. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but it’s not my cup of tea.

Anyway, the choice is yours.

And also remember, usually, change is good..

The United States of America is the greatest country on Earth.

For many reasons.

I don't get much traffic, but I consider this an Acidbath.

It's a matter of perspective.

I just found my Blue Jean Jacket. It’s been MIA, and I thought it was gone for good. It’s too cold to wear now, but it’s going into my staging area for spring.

When it comes to blue jeans, I’m a Levi man, but, when it comes to blue jean jackets, I’m a Wrangler man. You know, the one with four pockets. Gotta have those bottom pockets. I’ve had this particular jacket for over twenty years, and it’s still in good shape, been washed a million times, and will probably last for another twenty. It is perfect.

If the truth was told, and this jacket could talk, I’d still be in jail.

Today, I was reminded that some people obtain personal gratification from other people’s misfortune. I have no respect for these people. At all.

I'm just saying.

Why is it that my puppy, still, feels like it is alright to curl a steamer or take a leak inside the house, when it's raining outside?

I'm telling you, that little sumbitch is in deep shit.

Doesn't want to get his little paws wet? I can tell you something else; he does resemble a football, and it is the season. I just might practice my field goals with his young ass.

Damn!!!

I’ll cut you, then I’ll cut the bottom of your feet so you can’t run away, and then I’ll cut you some more.

The first time I cut someone, it was an accident. At least, I said it was. Actually, it was reflex. The mind is an amazing thing.

The boys and me were hanging out on the wall, drinking longnecks, shooting the shit and talking about girls. Why is it always girls? Back then, a 427 with two 4 barrels was bad. As bad, and more powerful than the girls we were discussing. Which is saying a lot, or not saying much; depends on how you look at it.

So, for whatever reason, drunken ass Billy lunged at me. I might be no bigger than a large stack of waffles, but I am fast. In the time it took my friend Billy to throw the first punch, I had removed the neck of the beer bottle, via the rock wall, and thrust my arm forward, slicing his first punch, bone deep, from wrist to elbow. I’m telling you, it was a bloody mess. The hospital kept him overnight, because he did lose a lot of blood.

Billy never fucked with challenged me again. As a matter of fact, we became close friends.

Isn't it funny how that happens?

I would like to thank my friend Eric, for the "Stack of Waffles". That is truely a classic.

"It is the falsehoods masquerading as truth that fear the light of scrutiny."

Random Fate

Michelle Malkin covers it. Kid Rock is a loser.

The older you get, the more immune from embarassment you become.

This is a CLASSIC.

I love the old tales.

Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston have split.

W H O G I V E S A S H I T ?

I say, Fuck 'em.

On the down side though, they won't be traveling to Israel to solve the Palestinian Problem.

This has me worried. I had so much hope!!!

Of course, I'd change my mind if he'd donate about 10 million to any cause that supports America. She can also kick in a little as far as I'm concerned.

Posting about this is a complete waste of time, but I've been known to waste a little time over the weekend.

I swap out my cell phone every couple of years. I have a particular brand that I like, so I usually upgrade to a newer model. I did it again, but on my new one, they reversed the functionality of the keys. "Dial" now disconnects, and "Hang Up" now connects.

At least I have a camera? I can think of no other use for this, except for taking pictures up girl's skirts in seedy bars.

Way too technical for me.

I just want the ability to say "Hello" from the back porch.

There is so much I want to say, but some people know who I am. Not good, or at least, I’ll admit when I’m a chicken shit. I want to tell it like it is. Know what I mean? At least, that’s the way it is for me. Too many people, who could actually pose problems to my livelihood, have somehow discovered this blog. Not that I care. I really don’t. Fuck You!

I’m thinking of a pen secret name. Not really. Maybe another blog?

Does anyone know what I mean? Any Ideas?

I want to lose myself.

Thanks…

I often hear people say they agree 100%. I also hear people say they agree 300%, or 1000%. What the hell is the diference?

If you agree 100% with me, then we're downtown with whatever it is was we were trying to agree on. If you agree 300%, does that mean I owe you 200% more agreement? What's that all about? How 'bout a thousand percent? 10 times?

I don't think it is possible to agree with someone > 100%. I can see "I agree with 70% of what you say, but..."

I'm just saying.

I took a couple of days off from blogging. I didn’t read or post anything; I didn’t even touch the Internet, except for work. The only time I fired up my browser was to access my Intranet. Did I miss it? Yes I did. You people are addictive.

Anyway, this is peculiar. It has been in the low 70’s here for the last several days. I’m talking shorts and tee shirts. Not that I’m complaining, but I hope it’s a good omen. It is never this warm in January. Never.

Hell, even my puppy is mixed up.

If the USA was hit by a tsunami, how many nations would come to our aid?

I'm just curious what you think, and why you feel that way. One way or the other.

Also, in keeping with the spirit of the UN, and Kofi Anan, I have but one thing to say: KISS MY ASS!!!

That is my only resolution for the coming year.

I'm not giving up anything; in fact, I hope to fine-tune all of my habits, both good and bad. Maybe add some more of both, but...

...I will become more effective.

The End Is Near.

I've been doing this blog shit for a little over a year. It’s been fun, but you know what was more funner?

Meeting these people in person.

Ladies first.

Key: She is prettier than I imagined, and smarter than that. Her husband is a lucky man. She’s a 10. Seriously. Just proves I’ve got good taste.

Kelley: A true Southern Woman. I would love more time with her. We’ve got many more conversations to navigate.

OK boys.

Acidman: Straight Up, Straight Down, Straight All Around. Well maybe not straight (I don’t mean that in a queer sense), but true to his guns. I admire that.

Catfish: Tells it like it is. No bullshit whatsoever. I admire that.

Eric The Blade: I want him on my team. Enough said. I admire that.

Velociman: I envy you my friend. A true commander of your life. I admire that.

These folks are what I call “shirt off my back people”.

Short and sweet, but y’all know what I mean.

The two most underrated tools in my kitchen.

Can also be used for comment spammers, who apparently, never take a day off.

If I ever capture one of 'em, they'll be making a one way trip to Jawja.

I've been married for eleven years, and this is the first year we're spending Christmas together, alone. Just us and that damn puppy. All of our family lives out of town, and we're not going anywhere until next week. How cool is that?

We're dug in, and looking forward to the Christmas feast we'll prepare tomorrow, and a lazy ass weekend.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy spending time with family and friends, but I also enjoy time alone with my wife. Anyway, we'll be scooting out next week to take care of our family obligations.

Peace and Goodwill to all.

I love the INTERNET.

That is all.

*** UPDATE ***

The telephone still works.

The other night I stayed with an old college buddy, and we just sat around reminiscing about the good ol’ days. It’s good for you to do that every now and then. Looking back on some of the shit we did, it’s amazing we aren’t both in jail. We were wild, not just wild, but crazy. We didn’t know where the off button was…that’s a fact.

I hope the current batch of college kids are as clever as we were, cause we never got caught.

I believe several years of being on ten, and having absolutely no respect for anything, is good for you. Builds character. It makes you appreciate life, when you finally slow down.

Just a thought.

I'm sitting here in this cheesy ass hotel room doing a little blogging, and I just went down to my ride to get another bottle of Boone's Farm, and you know what...it's snowing like hell. I have no idea where that came from.

Damn!

At least the wine is cold.

Hehheh!!!

A few thoughts from Acidman.

It's a BLOG, for cryin' out loud

He's got a point.

It’s freezing my ass off finally cold enough for a heavy coat, and I prefer goose down to synthetic filler, or wool. Wool will keep you warm even if it’s soaking wet, but it’s heavy and cumbersome. I left my Navy Pea Coat in the closet years ago. Coats stuffed with synthetic filler dry faster than down, but are not as warm. A goose down coat, with a waterproof shell, is the only way to go.

This is just my personal preference.

Congratulations to my friend from Down Under on the birth of his second son. May he have a rewarding and prosperous life.

By the way: two boy dogs. Your ass is in big trouble. I'll bet one of 'em is doing time by the time he's 20 years of age.

...If you want to hear deep thoughts and stunning wisdom, enroll in a college philosophy course. If you like a constant stream of knee-deep bullshit flowing like a lazy river, attend a blog-meet. Opinions will NEVER die of loneliness there...

***Acidman***

Bullshit wasn't the only thing knee deep.

On the Patio has a good one up about The Good Life.

Nail on the head!!!

My puppy Stretch knows his name. I know he does. His stubborn ass will just not admit it.

He is wild. After seven months, still, nothing is safe.

I'm sure everyone is familier with "Calling the Ball".

Call the Ball - A radio transmission to a pilot requesting that he report when he has sighted the BALL during approach to the carrier, or the action of reporting same. Typically consists of SIDE NUMBER, aircraft type (to ensure proper ARRESTING GEAR settings), and amount of fuel onboard in thousands of pounds, e.g. '205 Tomcat ball, 3.5'.

Well, it has a different meaning here in The Brier Patch.

For example:

My phone rings.

Me: "Hello"

Wife: "This is SANDBOX to base, over:

Me: "What?"

Wife: "I'm on final, and I'm calling the ball."

What this really means is that she has a bunch of stuff in the car, is about to pull into the driveway, and wants me to meet her outside and haul all the shit inside.

True Story.

I have never met a blogger face to face, but I talked to this guy last night, on the phone, for about an hour. It was a good conversation.

I have never talked to a stranger, for an hour...period.

I'm just saying...

It was my birthday a few days ago, and you know what? I didn't receive a card from my insurance man, or my broker.

How frapped up is that?

Oh Well!

No way these are the size of chairs.

I cannot believe this fat piece of shit actually took a bath.

Don't trust him.

The Truckonauts

I say we let 'em in. Should've done it the first time. We can always use more engineers.

Unlike the Mexican border situation, these people are fleeing political persecution.

This is a different shade of grey.

You Bitch has got it figured out.

This guy, Michael J. Totten, has a nice photo tour of Libya.

Link Via: The Vodka Pundit

This Guy......ain't......right!

Damn!!!

Yeap...I'm proud of this.

If you google for "Southern Idiots", the Brier Patch comes up number one.

Now, that's what I'm talking about. I am so downtown with that. Know what I mean?

Some people believe that if, or when, we have a telescope (or some tool) powerful enough, we will be able to see back in time (into the past) and witness the Big Bang, or the Creation, or whatever.

I find it fascinating, that light viewed through a telescope, is actually old light. The further you see, the older the light. It makes sense to me, but does it really make any difference? We’re in the present, not the past.

If this tool had a pretty good zoom, could I see my birth?

Hell if I know, but I think about shit like this on Sundays.

I was just thinking. If there are 2 billion Muslims on planet Earth, and only 1% (20 million) aspire to murderous suicide / homicide acts of terror, we've got a long row to hoe. But it also means they need to come up with 1 billion, 440 million virgins.

Now, that's a bunch of hoes.

My Sweetie has lost her mind. She’s started naming names. I thought we’d be able to keep this under the covers, so to speak. I thought the Godfather ruse would work, but she changed her mind. So, while I ponder my options, y’all go have a cold beverage. It could be worse; at least he’s got a nice blog going on.

"Neutrality is at times a graver sin than belligerence."

- Louis D. Brandeis

In this day and age, we would do well to remember this.

I missed it, but this was my one thousandth post. Not that it matters, but, when I started this blog, I never thought I'd write more than a post a day, if that. Now, in 389 days, I'm over a thousand.

And you know what? Number one-thousand could be considered radical. I don't care. I didn't plan it that way. I didn't even know it until after the fact.

I even got an Acidbath, if that makes any difference. They are painful hurt so good!

Oh Well!!

This is one fine post.

As Jack says, "the echos of history last longer than we realize."

This bitch can kiss the north end of a duck flying south.

...“There are definitely people depressed by John Kerry’s loss, and this can easily lead to suicides like the one we saw up in New York this weekend,”...

Says Rob Gordon, an American Red Cross psychotherapist.

Maybe she needs some of this.

Idiots

The taking of hostages has always been a problem for me. Cowardly bastards who use hostages, or human shields, or whatever you want to call them, to further their cause, or make an escape, make me want to puke. There is no honor in this, but it must be dealt with.

The Merriam – Webster Dictionary defines hostage as:

1 a: a person held by one party in a conflict as a pledge that promises will be kept or terms met by the other party b: a person taken by force to secure the taker's demands

2: one that is involuntarily controlled by an outside influence

These “so called Fallujah hostages” are not controlled by an (2) outside influence. They are victims of their own misguided beliefs. It’s not like they haven’t had the opportunity to give up the bad guys. I call it a backfire.

In a recent post, I stated that we should level Fallujah, and kill everyone. My friend Jack asks a good question in the comments. I don’t have a definitive yes or no answer, but I do know that when IslamoFascist terrorist pigs take hostages, they have no intention of releasing them. There were no demands made. They are really not hostages, but already casualties of their captor’s radical beliefs. These pigs have no intention of releasing them, they are backed into a corner, and they know it. They are desperate.

So, what to do? Do we go slinking around buildings, through doorways and on rooftops…taking more casualties than necessary, or do we send them a message?

I say we send them a message. As I’ve said many times before, we’ve got to play by their rules, if we want to win. They slaughter their own people. We don’t. They are cowards who hide behind their women and children. We don’t. They know we will back off. We shouldn’t, but we will.

Maybe, just once, we should kill ‘em all, and see what happens. See if they get the message. It doesn’t have to be this way. They started it.

I wonder what would have happened, on November 4, 1979, when Iranian militants stormed our embassy in Tehran and took approximately seventy Americans captive, if Jimmy Dumbass Carter had issued this ultimatum, and followed through with it.

“We have B-52’s circling Tehran as I speak. We expect you to release all Americans within 24 hours, or we’ll bomb Tehran back into the 7th century. We are willing to kill 8 million people, as well as all Americans you have unlawfully taken into custody. The choice is yours. This is your final chance.
If that had happened, where would we be today? Better or worse?

We cannot negotiate with terrorists.

Jimmy Carter committed himself to protecting his own political future, not America's interests and prestige, much less the safe return of the hostages. He pursued a policy of restraint that put a higher value on the lives of the hostages than it did on the value of America.

One question.

As a civilian, would you sacrifice your life for your country?

Today is a perfect day here in North Carolina. Cool, crisp, and lots of sunshine. Absolutely, the nicest day we've had this fall. Absolutely.

The pot of White Beans smells good. The Collard Greens smell good. My beautiful wife with soup-cooling lips is looking good. Our decision on whether to have "hoe cakes" or "cornbread" is all I have on my mind.

Also, my puppy, who is practicing final approach glides, is looking good.

Damn, I hope y'all are as content as me.

Life is good!

While I am content, and fat and happy; I would like to thank everyone in our military, and those serving overseas, for making this possible.

I mean that from the bottom of my heart!!!!!

God Bless you all.

Acidman is downtown with this.

And you know what, if you stay on it, I won't have to worry about it either.

After I voted, I stopped in a U*S store to send a couple of packages. There were two young girls, and one adult, packing boxes full of stuffed animals. Big boxes, and lots of ‘em. Curious, I asked one of the young ladies, what gives?

She told me that she and some friends, with the support of her church, had organized a project to collect as many stuffed animals as possible, to send to the children in Russia who were victimized indiscriminately slaughtered by terrorists IslamoFascist pigs earlier this year.

There were over 1000 individual cards (one for each toy) written by each kid who had donated one of their animals to the cause, and each card was translated into Russian below the original message. She found a translator. Good job.

She was so proud. You know what? I am to.

Not bad for a small town in North Carolina.

Americans.

Angel Eyes says, "A golden-haired angel watches over him."...and I don't even know him. Too bad, but I think he's talking to pointing at you.

Beverages are on me. No bones about it.

I'm tired of picking up all the beer bottles laying around the political sign in my front yard. I hope it's just a target, and not a bad sign of things to come. I think I live in the right neighborhood, but you never know.

I have several new friends (more than acquaintances) who have known each other for a long time. Some are to the left, and some are to the right. The upcoming election is, in my opinion, driving them crazy. Radical Crazy. I do not believe they’ll be able to salvage their friendships, and this is not good. I have never seen this country so divided.

Over the years I’ve learned the difference between “rolling over” and “backing off”. I would never “roll over”, but I think it’s time (for them) to “back off”. I would never compromise my beliefs for anyone, ever; but I also understand the importance of friendship.

Sometimes you just have to back off, cool off, and re-group. Sometimes you just have to make a decision for the future. Sometimes you have to agree to disagree, and be done with it.

The only other option, is not worth it.

Both sides are Nuts.

Weekly Reader kids select Bush in Presidential Poll.

You never know!!!

My puppy and I have been going on daily patrols for some time now. Even before he was a puppy (born), I noticed this. Immediately following 9/11, everyone was flying an American flag. Now, it seems that, 90% of the people have taken them down. Why is that?

Another Question.

Do you believe the courts will decide this Presidential Election?

...is NOT an ethnic slur.

I’m sick and tired of hearing the media refer to radical Islamic scumbags as Extremists or Rebels or Insurgents. They are IslamoFascist Terrorists, plain and simple.

"If it walks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck."

Does anyone really believe that Iraq, and the world for that matter, would be better off if Saddam Hussein was still in power?

And if so, why?

Found this over at Dax's.

I'm surprised with 100%

You preferred Bush's statements 100% of the time Voting purely on the issues you should vote Bush Who would you vote for if you voted on the issues? Find out now!

I hear you want to get involved. That is good news, and IMHO, the duty of every American.

Remember, in America, we have Freedom of Speech, so...leave some DAMN comments.

You know who you are.

This election is going to be a real mess. The lawyers are already circling.

Who would have expected this? Not me.

On a seemingly unrelated matter, I agree with Kelley.......we sure as hell aren't in Kansas any more.

The American political process will never be the same.

I’m back…I think. It’s been a long time since I’ve been to a wedding and reception with 450 – 500 people. We had a great time…We think. I saw a bunch of old friends, and made some new ones…I think.

I almost died…I think. Got a piece of food stuck in my damn throat, and couldn’t breathe…started to get dizzy from lack of air, and some football player put the Heimlich maneuver on me. As a result of that, the food was dislodged enough for me to breathe and eject it, but my right-side ribs are trashed. Getting out of a car is a trick, and I have to roll out of bed. I guess it’s better than being dead.

I-40 from North Carolina to Tennessee, and back, is a beautiful drive, but, since the hurricanes dumped so much water in the mountains, we’ve got some major problems. There is one tunnel westbound, and two tunnels eastbound. Both directions are down to one lane, because of the Hole. Right before you pass through the first eastbound tunnel (uphill), the interstate disappears. I mean, it is gone; replaced by a hole with a diameter of about 500 yards, and a thousand feet deep. So, the NCDOT had to steal one of the westbound lanes…it took us about an hour and twenty minutes to go FIVE uphill miles. No shit. 1:20. This is going to take a while to fix, and I have no idea how they’ll do it…there’s nothing there to fix…so, if your heading west, add about twenty minutes because you’ll be going downhill, which is no problem for the trucks…BUT, if your heading the other way, add between one and two hours…those damn trucks just can’t stop and start going uphill. This has been a public service announcement.

My wife and I are tied. We both puked. Me, from choking, and her, well, she gets drunk about once every three or four years, and Saturday night was one of ‘em. She was red wine puking ass drunk. I guess it was all right the HOLE added about an hour and a half to our ride…she needed the sleep. Poor Baby.

This piddley ass blog will be one year old this Sunday, October 17. There are two reasons for putting this up now.

1. I’m heading across the Great Smokey Mountains in the morning for Nashville to attend a wedding. It certainly will be a beautiful drive, and it will definitely be one of those 72-hour (la-de-da) weddings. Dinner and Drinks And Lodging With My Beautiful Wife Somewhere Along The Way, Cocktails, Rehearsal Dinner, Moonshine & Cigars, Sleep Late, Pre-Wedding Jitter Busters, Long Ass Wedding with Communion, Reception with a World Class Band and old friends, No-Telling, Sunday Brunch. Damn, I’m already worn out. Miss Barbie and I are going to have a GOOD time.

2. I’m really going to miss the Blogtoberfest ,and the chance to shoot the shit with these folks:

My Internet Chic from Key Issues
Acidman from Gutrumbles
Adam the Single Southern Guy
Dax Montana from The Dax Files
Denny the Grouchy Old Cripple in Atlanta
Geoffrey & Gordon from Dog Snot Diaries
Jimbo from Parkway Rest Stop
Eric the Straight White Guy
Kelley from Suburban Blight
Momma from Mamamontezz
Velociman O'Velociworld

…and everyone else who goes to Helen, or has stopped by The Brier Patch. I truly appreciate it.

Y’all have a good time!!!

Now, my first post which is now...About Me.

Be back next week.

I just awoke from a "power nap", and I am refreshed. I was dreaming about...well nevermind.

Unlike Winston Churchill, I tapped napped in my clothes.

Dreaming in the daytime is a good thing.

Every time my dog puppy is in trouble, he is my dog. At all other times, he is her (my Wife's) puppy. As in, "Where's your dog?" as opposed to, "Where's my puppy?"

And you know what? He knows this.

I'm just saying...

I've been teaching a class for the past four days...all women. I'm done done done done. I've spent all day, every day, for the last four days with women...and business dinner's every night.

Don't get me wrong, I love women, but I was outnumbered, and I'm glad it's over.

Did you know that women communicate with each other without speaking?

Yeap, they sure do.

I was going to stop posting about my damn puppy dog, but today he had his first kill.

Kilt that snake dead...he did.

He is now known as "Snake Boy".

Good job Stretch

Here in North Carolina, we just had some major red and yellow banders blow through. 50 MPH gusts, horizontal sheets of rain, the whole nine yards.

I don't know why, but I love a good storm. My yard doesn't though, looks like I was strafed.

Question: What does an F-15 and my puppy Stretch
have in common?

Answer: They both fly, and they both SCREAM!!!

One just flew over at low altitude, and my puppy flew inside, screaming.

He still ain't right!

Chief Forecaster Sam from The Brier Patch has issued the following statement to all persons living within 100 miles of the coast in Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, and the Florida panhandle.

21:30 ZULU WED SEP 15 2004
16:30 EDT WED SEP 15 2004
15:30 CDT WED SEP 15 2004

GOOD LUCK AND GODSPEED…

I'm downtown with this.

Y'all head on over here and wish my Internet Chic a happy birthday!

Thanks.

Although I believe former President William Jefferson Clinton has no moral character, is a lying sack of shit, and has mislead all Americans on vital issues; I wish him no ill will.

I hope he makes a speedy and complete recovery. I mean that!

Politics and life are interesting, but death is the end. I hope he recovers and continues to challenge all of us “right thinkers”.

Futures contracts are agreements to deliver an amount of goods, usually commodities, at a specific price at a certain time in the future. The purpose of the futures exchanges is to allow people who do want to assume risk, such as farmers, to transfer that risk to speculators who are willing to take the risk in hopes of making big profits.

..."If this storm does hit where people are expecting, I think we still have higher to go"...

Rank these women in accending order where (A) is class, and (D) is trash.

A. Maria Teresa Thiersten Simoes-Ferreira Heinz Kerry

B. Barbara Pierce Bush

C. Hillary Rodham Clinton

D. Laura Welch Bush

I'm going anyway, (that is unless they close downhill traffic) and if I need to break for cover early, so be it. I think it will make landfall in the Cape Fear, North Carolina area. But, what the hell do I know...I'll have another prediction tomorrow.

This really is a, fairly, large storm.

Notice the track has already moved further to the northwest.

...my Labor Day weekend plans.

You never know, this far out, but North Carolina is a magnet for Hurricanes. We’ll be watching this one closely.

This is where we go. 34°12'40" North, 77°47'55" West (34.211194, -77.798636)

I have no crystal ball, but historically, these storms move to the northwest of the center line.

I once knew a girl named Frances, and she was a Bitch!!!

...of why we are going to have to change the way we think to effectively deal with IslamoFascist radicals.

This one's for you, Teresa Ketchup-Kerry

Hat tip to Daniel.

I understand how the people feel who lost everything in Hurricane Charley.

Years ago, I lost EVERYTHING in an apartment fire. I mean everything. There was nothing left except ashes, and the barrel of my shotgun; which was bowed about 45 degrees. Now, that’s a hot fire.

I barely escaped with my life. My balls were burned (no permanent problem or scars there…thank God), my left hand was severely burned, and all the hair on my body was singed off, but I made it out alive. I saved another human life that night…the girl next door.

I will never forget the sinking feeling I had when the whole structure collapsed in a huge fireball. All my stuff was…gone. Gone forever. In an instant…gone forever.

I was in shock. I was disheartened, and I was sad. I didn’t know what to do, and I remember being very uncertain about the future. I remember forcing my way out of the back of an ambulance; why, I don’t know. I remember, trying to remember if someone who lived there was out of town. I knew everyone who lived there, and the head count didn’t tally. I remember all of the panicked people, including firefighters. Is there anyone left inside? Any children? Are there any pets? Can you remember?

It was Chaos.

I remember the crowd, and I remember their tears. I will never forget their tears, ever.

I remember waking up the next day at my parents; and when I realized it wasn’t a bad dream…the depression set in.

I thought I was done…the end…how can I ever recover?

But you know what, I was wrong.

When I went downstairs, I found my friends, and not only had they brought everything I needed (clothes, shoes, etc.), they brought their support and attitudes.

By late that afternoon I’d made one of the most important decisions of my life, and that was: FUCK IT, it doesn’t matter. I’m alive, and life is good. Everything can be replaced, except a life.

I’ve never looked back.

...in my house. That is, since the Velocipuppy Stretch Chew Monster moved in. The only things touching the floor are the legs of my chairs and tables. For some reason, he doesn’t eat the furniture, but will eat everything else. Outside is a different matter...a whole different ballgame.

Anyway, he's now capable of jumping up on the couch, and from there to the tables. Amazing, I think I'm in trouble...now, he will be able to actually cruise around the house at "mid-level". For him, it's a target rich environment.

I think so...

Key has a point.

Excerpt:

...The reason I fear too much information is because it clouds the real issue. Issues. Issues. Issues... Abortion, guns, religion, gay rights, poverty, education, taxes, freedom, wars...

Everybody has one, and many are so passionate about their adopted causes that they lose sight of what makes us special...

My friend is downtown with this post.

The National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), which oversees preschool teacher training, curriculum standards and daycare accreditation, is good for American children and parents...except when they do stupid shit like this.

Excerpt:

What are you doing to protect your 3-year-old from the radical antiwar agenda?

Example: The nation's largest and most influential organization of early childhood educators sells a teacher's guide that depicts the famed Blue Angels, our U.S. Navy's flight demonstration squadron of F-18 Hornet fighter pilots, as heartless killers threatening to bomb innocent American children.

This really really SUCKS!!!

Go check out the Blue Angels.

Click to enlarge.

When I was a young boy, I learned a very important lesson...and that was

Never, ever, piss on an electric fence. Trust me, it ain't worth it.

Oh well...live and learn.

Who do you really think Hillary will vote for when she closes the curtain?

She doesn’t give a shit about anyone but herself. A Hopeless and Helpless win will surely put a little dirt in her fuel line, so to speak.

...but some things never change.

I was talking to a man who is 67 years of age. He has always voted for Democrats, always will. He has always driven a Buick, always will. He always shops at the same grocery store, always will. He always parks his car in the same place, always will.

He always does everything the same way he always has, and he always will.

Right, wrong, or indifferent, there are a lot of people who are just like him.

Some people are just afraid of change, and these are the people we need to worry about.

Remember, his vote counts just as much as ours.

Today, the Democratic National Convention begins.

On July 26, 1908, the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) is born when U.S. Attorney General Charles Bonaparte orders a group of newly hired federal investigators to report to Chief Examiner Stanley W. Finch of the Department of Justice. One year later, the Office of the Chief Examiner was renamed the Bureau of Investigation, and in 1935 it became the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

I enjoy putting a new edge on a knife. I also enjoyed, back in the olden days, being able to take all my kitchen knives to the local butcher and have him do it. Everyone did. Once a year, we’d drop ‘em off and pick ‘em up later, sharp and oiled…fine-tuned so to speak. It’s really not laziness; it’s good for the community.

Not any more…not since the insurance companies got involved.

I guess if you cut yourself with a knife that someone else sharpened, you can sue him or her. How whacked out is that?

There is one thing I detest about some people...those who get personal gratification from other peoples misfortune. I hate to admit it, but I know some folks like that.

Assholes...

May the fleas of 1000 camels nest in their ears.

...has been too cute, since before there was broadband.

I'm just saying.

...or pure PAIN!!!

I've been stung many times before.

When I was a kid, I experienced the normal bee and wasp stings. Raw tobacco handled 'em. I once crashed my bicycle into a hornet’s nest, and was stung about 50 times...I lived. Hurt like Hell, but I lived.

When I was in college...I was getting a friend of mine out of jail...driving his car...pulled up to the jail...pulled up my boots, and tied 'em off, and DAMN!!!...Scorpion was in there...hit me twice on the bottom of my foot in the tender area between my toes and heel. I was down on my knees in pain...slept for 18 hours. Hurt like double Hell, but I lived.

After that, I got wrapped up in a Portuguese Man-of-War that damn near killed me. I have never experienced pain like that. Hurt like triple Hell. I thought I might die. My whole right side was frapped up for a long time. It felt like I was sliced by multiple razor blades...No kidding...That was a BAD ASS JELLYFISH.

You never know!!!

I received the following email.

"Your website is one of the most hateful, stupid I've read, and that's saying something."

I'll say something.

I might be stupid, but I am in no way hateful.

Thank you very much.

Now, you can KISS MY ASS!!!

When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to answer "Present" or "Not guilty."

Theodore Roosevelt

Once again, shamelessly ripped from Geoffrey.

Johnny wants to do Johnny.

How very French they are.

Stretch...No...No...No...Stop...No...Damnit No...Arghhh....Stop.....Good Boy...Good Boy....No...I said No....Stop it....Damnit...Stop...Come...Come Stretch...No...No...Stop it. Damnit, come....Stretch, come....No No No...Stop Damnit....Don't run from me...don't run....Bwahahaha

What are you doing over there?....No Stretch No...I said No....Come Stretch...Come...Damnit...Damnit....No...I said come...Arghghgh!!!

It's a good thing I have a sense of humor!!!, otherwise you'd have heard some Bang Bangs!

MY NEW PUPPY IS DRIVING ME CRAZY !

...and killing my hammock

Everyone deserves a good pair. I’ve had mine for a long time, and I expect I’ll get many more years out of ‘em before they need a tune-up. I do mean a tune up for the soles...the sides and top should last forever. I kid you not.

Another friend and I were traveling in the East Tennessee Mountains about ten years ago, when we came upon a sign in the middle of nowhere that simply said, “Thunderhead Moccasins”. WTF, this was in the middle of nowhere, it was a nice cabin, and so we approached and knocked on the door. We were met by a Dachshund, and an old man who was as curious as the dog, and as we were. After all the simple pleasantries, he determined, that we were there to buy his “one of a kind”, “handmade / cut and sewn” moccasins.

He was right.

He would make us whatever we wanted, in six months. I said with a backlog of six months, business must be good. He said, no, I'll start on ‘em now; it just takes that long to season the hides.

Did they cost a lot of money? Depends on how you look at it. Are they worth it? Yeap! Would I buy another pair? Yeap! Are they the most comfortable pair of footwear I have (with or without socks) ever had? Yeap!

We cut the deal with a handshake, and he got to measuring.

Mine are:

Boar for the soles.
Deer on the inside.
Elk around the outside.
Shark on top.

Best (most comfortable) damn shoes I’ve ever had.

Intensive Care Unit Cage

Yeap, that’s where the Velocipuppy spent the day yesterday, and man, he was in bad shape.

I’ve posted about severe allergic reactions, and life threatening anaphylactic shock allergic reactions in the past; so here’s the Dog version.

My new puppy, Stretch, goes to the Vet for the first time. He gets the nasal spray…sneeze…no problem, then the oral gook, no problem…then the shot in the hip/ass, no problem. I was impressed. I’m thinking how much things have changed since the last time I had a puppy. By then, he’d already snowed all the babes in the office, so I put his wiggly ass in my ride, and we head home.

We’d been home for about two minutes, and his face began to swell. I knew what was happening, so I called the Vet, scooped him up, broke for the car, and hauled ass back to the Dog hospital. They were waiting with open arms. No kidding, his eyes were almost swollen shut and his snout was three times the size it should be; but he was breathing fine, I think.

The nurse rushes him straight back to the ER, and they inject him with an antihistamine and corticosteroid. It works, but he must remain for observation for the rest of the day.

Fine…Good…I go home and begin researching “allergic reactions to vaccines in dogs” and discover more than I ever wanted to know. I won’t bore you with the details, but his reaction is not uncommon, because…there are no controls, to speak of, on animal vaccines. In his case, they combined “5 vaccines” in one injection, so if there is a problem, you don’t know which one caused it. And, you could cook this shit up in your garage if you wanted…no real regulations, and no quality control. Also, there are some genetically engineered vaccines out there in the wild. Pre-certification.

My Vet is reputable, the best in town (per recommendations), and the closest to my house, but…I’m just saying.

Anyway, everything is cool now, but I admit, it scared the shit out of me.

He is a southern dog, and is being taught manners. He sent a mess of flowers today; to all the girls he snowed yesterday.

Good Dog!

Brazenly ripped from Jack.

...If you say you support our troops but you do not get involved, you do not understand the issues, you do not vote, then you are betraying the very principles for which our soldiers have fought and died and even today continue to fight and die to defend.

We call them "rights", but in the harsh reality of the world, these rights are not given, they are earned.

Read it all.

Bullshit, we're not talking about respect here. Lets get our priorities straight.

To be effective, you must blend in. I've picked them out on flights, and if I can, a bad guy can. They are SO obvious.

..."In an era when "dressing down" is the traveler's creed, air marshals must show up in jackets and ties, hair cut short, bodies buffed, shoes shined..."

..."Officials with the Federal Air Marshal Service, however, defended their sartorial standards. "Professional demeanor, attire and attitude gain respect," spokesman David M. Adams said. "If a guy pulls out a gun and he's got a tattoo on his arm and [is wearing] shorts, I'm going to question whether he's a law enforcement officer..."

Who cares, the guy in shorts with the tattoo has the gun, and you have to respect that.

You must be as inconspicuous as possible.

Anyway, here's the article.

I was raised like this, as well.

Excerpt:

"If I were your neighbor, you would like me."

I will have refreshments with him. Someday.

From time to time, many of you have seen me make references to my Internet Chic. We both started our blogs at about the same time; I liked her from the get-go. I liked what she had to say (and still do), and I like that she has opinions and will express �em.

It was my wife who told me, �you have an Internet Chic�. I gave her the keys to this blog when I flew south for a little vacation with my wife and some friends. Key posted some good stuff, and is welcome to �come on in� anytime she wants. The door is always open.

I�ve never seen her, never heard her voice, and have had anything but electronic communications with her to this day.

I�m a man with good tastes, especially when it comes to women; just ask my sweetie. To prove it to you, go here. She has revealed herself.

I�m right again, and I love it when that happens.

My Back Door Girl - is a compliment!!!

I was in northern Kentucky last weekend and the Cicada attack was underway. There were millions and millions of ‘em, and the noise; one cicada is loud, but when they all start buzzing simultaneously, it’s deafening. The squealing progresses from low pitch to high pitch, a short pause and then repeats. This incessant buzzing can also be heard while driving 90 MPH with the windows down. Amazing.

It is said that a circular saw will really set 'em off...same pitch or something. I didn't try it, since the standard buzz was enough.

They fly in swarms, and when the wind blows, the dead (which are dried and crisp) fall from the trees and cover the ground, like a hailstorm.

Cicadas have a prehistoric look to them, so I guess that’s why children love ‘em so much. At least the kids in northern Kentucky do.

Anyway, I’ve known my wife for almost 14 years, been married to her for 10 of ‘em, and I’ve never, ever, heard her scream like I did on Sunday. One of ‘em dive-bombed her and became entangled in her hair; and when she brushed it off, it flew down her blouse and started flapping and squealing. She went ballistic. I’ve also never seen her rip off her shirt in her sister’s back yard. That was funny. Her family thought I was killing her.

It was a good trip; especially driving home through the mountains of West Virginia.

And speaking of West Virginia – “Daddy, get off me, you’re crushing my Marlboros.”

Just want to make sure we're clear on this.

The liberal is continually angry, as only a self-important man can be, with his civilization, his culture, his country and his folks back home. His is an infantile world view. At the core of a liberal is the spoiled child -- miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

-- P.J. O'Rourke

Some more deep stuff.

I said last week that I'd puppy-proofed my house. Wrong. I brought him home on Monday, and by Tuesday I realized the only puppy proof house, is a house with no puppy. Oh well. What was I thinking?

As Anne said: It's a Little Brown Dog, from the Latin "Chewus Everythingus Upus."

He will eventually live outside, but now he's too small. Unattended, he's hawk food.

For the record: I've said "NO" more times in the last 48 hours, than I have in my life.

I’ve been gone for four days…1,400 miles roundtrip…and a bunch of memories, and a bunch of whining…mainly, from the new puppy (monster). If he makes it through the night…he is good to go, and if not…I’ve got some explaining to do.

Whatever happens…I want everyone to know…I’ve only shot seven dogs, ever.

Stevie has paid me a great compliment, and I truly appreciate it. I don’t know about “well-written”, but I am, without a doubt, opinionated. As to where she found me, I have no idea. I thought I found her. I’ve always been good at finding the cool girls.

Anyway, Caught in the X Fire has always been a daily stop for me, so y’all go check her out.

Thanks again.

Check out the last comment on An Orininal Thought?

Excerpt:

"If you think you have an original thought or idea, and read about it in a book or magazine, does that article deminish or negate your idea (or thought) as original?"...

Very Interesting.

I just experienced a storm that damn near blew the peppers off the plants, and the squirrels out of the trees.

Awesome.

I'm just saying!

I, for one, am proud to be an American, and I will show support for my country at all times. If anyone, ever, told me that showing loyalty for my country “might be viewed as confrontational or insulting or cause embarrassment" to people from other nations; they’re going to experience my wrath.

Mike Moran, a veteran former spokesman for the United States Olympic Committee who has been retained as a consultant to advise athletes how to behave should be stripped of U.S. citizenship, and deported. He is a traitor, and should be ashamed of himself.

It's not just about our flag, it's about our "colors". If you get my drift.

Unfuckingbelievable.

Here’s the link. What are people thinking about?

Two moves - Black (click picture to enlarge)

Fool's mate is a special case of checkmate in the game of chess. Chess is not a game of chance; it is based solely on tactics and strategy. Nevertheless, the game is so complex that even the best players can't consider all contingencies. There are a few slight variations on the pattern - White might play f4 instead of f3 or move the g-pawn before the f-pawn, and black may play e6 instead of e5.

This is notable as being the shortest possible game ending in checkmate.

Shorter games have occured when a player resigns, agrees to a draw, or forfeits due to not showing up.

You know what I love about the game of chess? No luck, period. No dice.

It is, what it is.

Is there a connection between Nicolas Berg and Zacarias Moussaoui, or is it a coincidence? Supposedly, Moussaoui had the password to one of Berg’s email accounts.

What are the chances of this, or that they had ever even met?

This is too strange.

My wife is a planner, that’s for certain. She’s also sweeter than honeydew vine water, but that story is for a different time.

As we anxiously await the arrival of a new puppy, her brain is processing on full tilt boogie. She has “puppy proofed” the house. Trust me, this dog will not go where we don’t want it. Blockades, razor wire, mine fields, gates…hell, the only thing I’m missing are checkpoints manned by armed Terminators. (Eventually, this will be an “outside dog”)

I’m good with all of this…I have five computers, and all the associated peripherals, cables, etc. in my office…so the last thing I need is a puppy chewing up all of this shit.

BUT in my kitchen, is a new HUGE ASS trash can. It’s like one of several we use at the beach, which will hold about 10 cases of beer cans.

There is absolutely no way a full grown Dachshund, much less a puppy, could ever hope to access the garbage or turn the container over. I mean, the damn thing weighs about 800 lbs. full, and I’ll need a two-wheeler and a crane just to “take out the trash”.

Well, I guess, overkill is good sometimes.

Sorry Dax, but Just Damn!

I love it when a plan comes together.

Acidman has a good post up about dreaming.

Go here to read it.

I know what he means.

Eric says it well.

Anyway, The Straight White Guy has another story...Stay tuned.

And you would to if you spent the weekend hoeing your garden. Not to mention, I removed the tip of my left hand bird finger with an ed wusthof dreizackwerk 10-inch knife.

I’ve had this knife for over twenty years; it’s never needed a new edge, and it still doesn’t. I hope the Germans use the same technology in their automobiles.

That’d be cool with me.

This situation could quite possibility be a reality in the U.S. in the near future.

I'm all for it...we should learn from our friends...

I'm just saying.

This is weird...

My shower has two settings depending on the seasons.

In spring and summer, it's full blast cold, and you adjust the temperature with the hot.

In winter, it's the opposite. Full blast hot, adjusting with the cold.

I’ve never given it much thought before…I must be losing it.

I've been really busy the last couple of days...but, my Internet Chic says it quite well here, and here.

It is, what it is.

Driving back from the beach today, I encountered a major driving “Red Band” thunderstorm. It was raining and blowing so hard, people weren’t waiting for an exit, they were just pulling off on the shoulder. It was the first time I’ve had to drive my new ride in this type of weather, and I’m telling you, this was a badass storm.

For a car with only one windshield wiper, it is incredibility stable. Tight. You feel safe, therefore you’re confident, so you just keep on driving. You don't go with the flow...you are the flow.

I now know what “glued to the road” means.

Sweet!

A Mosque, like 2nd base, is in the middle of the battlefield. When touching second, or inside a Mosque, you are safe.

I think it’s time to change the rules. War is not a sport.

I’m just saying.

What do y’all think?

Gotta do it...

Instructions:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 23.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.

Result:

Thickly bearded Bessians and Dalmatians, Egyptians with gold rings in there ears, redheaded Germans, olive-skinned Greeks and Cilicians, great muscled Nubians as black as charcoal and with eyes bloodshot by wine--men from every country of the empire, all of them desperate enough, or ambitious enough, or stupid enough, to be willing to trade twenty-five years of their lives at the oars in return for Roman citizenship.

~~Pompeii, by Robert Harris.

I read in Dax's Comments, that Acidman thinks Kerry will lose by a landslide.

I hope he's right.

It won't be long before I pick up my new puppy. He's a Cream Dachshund, and my wife wants to name him "Stretch"...I want to call him "Cornbread".

What do y'all think? I'm open for suggestions.

I really don't care about anything in that "Cream Dachshund link", just trying to illustrate the cream gene.

Second Best dog I ever had was a mutt!!!

Hat Tip to Bob.

Follow the pages...this is Good.

To begin our journey, we must learn a little something about radiation.

...What I do have is...the absolute freedom to ride...

Very interesting.

Sunday Night (04/18/04 - 11:18 pm), I watched on television from my home in North Carolina the Soyuz Spaceship launch from Kazakhstan's Baikonur Cosmodrome.

Several minutes later, I went into my backyard and saw an object as bright as a star moving from north to south. It went from horizon to horizon in less than a minute.

I hope it was Soyuz, because if not, I saw a UFO.

Well…it’s been a beautiful weekend here in North Carolina… the Azalea’s and Dogwood’s are blooming…the birds are singing…my new dog is 15 days old…life is good.

I planted my garden, eighty plants in seven rows, but the rows are crooked. That’s what happens when you do a beer a row. That’s all right though…the plants don’t know.

Soon, I’ll be up to my elbows in:

Habanero Peppers
Jalapeno Peppers
Cayenne Peppers
Red Chili Peppers
Anaheim Peppers
Hot Banana Peppers
Sweet Banana Peppers
Thai Chili Peppers
Mystery Red Peppers

I usually set out more of a variety, but these are all I could find this year.

I hope I’ll have a boatload of:

Roma Tomatoes
German Johnson Tomatoes
Brandywine Tomatoes

Not to mention:

Kentucky Pole Beans.

And all the herbs and flowers you can imagine.

I also managed to wash my car, and my wife’s truck.

Now, I’m going to pour myself a stiff drink of the Cruzan Confusion, and take a long hot ass bubble bath using some of my wife’s fooie stuff. I’ll smell like an over made-up French tart, but that’s OK, I’ll be clean.

Sometimes you just gotta do, what you gotta do.

Here it is.

I was watching O’Reilly last night before President Bush, and I have a few observations about both. These are not exact quotes; I’m working from memory, but I think I’m close enough.

O’Reilly said, in reference to 9/11, he’s “appalled at all the innocent people who had to die because of Federal Inefficiency”.

I disagree. It wasn’t the inefficiency of the Federal Government who slaughtered 3000 innocent people; it was IslamoFascist terrorists supported by Islamic Regimes who pretend to be friendly to, and tolerant of, the United States of America.

O’Reilly also used the term “Theocratic Terror”.

I somewhat disagree. Theocratic is of, relating to, or being a Theocracy. Theocracy is the government of a state by immediate divine guidance or by officials who are regarded as divinely guided or a state governed by a theocracy. If this is true, then we need to retaliate against Saudi Arabia for obvious reasons. For all intents and purposes, the 9/11 hijackers were from Saudi Arabia. The fact is, in my opinion, these followers of radical Islam recognize no state / nation borders. They’re running around like a bunch of rabid animals, and are being protected by Islamic Regimes regardless of their nation states. So, it is Fanatical, Radical, Fundamental Islamic Terror, and not Theocratic Terror. Islam is not a state.

Bush said, “I will not allow our young ones to die in vain, and that is not going to happen on my watch.” “If we leave, that’s what will happen.”

I agree, he’s right. We must stay the course and see it through. Remember, we didn’t start this war, but we’ve got to finish it. Whatever it takes. I mean WHATEVER.

Bush also said, the IslamoFascists have “no guilt in killing innocent people, and we cannot let this continue…this war will go on for a long time.”

He’s right again, this war will go on for a long time, and we must be committed for the duration. If we do not prevail, there will be no future. Period.

Finally, Bush said, “When I say something…I mean it.

No Flip Flopping like that asshole Kerry…know what I mean.

I’m just saying…

There was a time when I admired Andy Rooney. Not any more. He is living in the past, and is too old and set in his ways to understand the reality of the present...things have changed, period.

Read five loaded questions and his senile commentary below.

Andy - you need a nap.

***UPDATE***

Jim didn't hold back like me. A much better job. GO READ THIS.

The Straight White Guy is in this kind of mood.

Good for him...I've been there many times before.

I wonder how Spain feels now. al Qaida bombs them and sways the national election in their favor. Then Spain surrenders, and vows to bring its troops home from Iraq, in hopes that the terrorist dirt bags of al Qaida will leave them alone. Spain finds more bombs targeting their railway systems, and their troops are ambushed in Iraq before they can run away.

They respond by doing nothing. Cowards...

Hell, they must be taking lessons from the French.

1/32nd = $75.00

I returned a leased car today, and the inspection was comical. The inspector was down on his hands and knees measuring the depth of tread on the tires.

LF = 4/32"
LR = 5/32"
RR = 5/32"
RF = 3/32"
SP = 5/32"

It's not the money, it's the principle. These people want me to buy a new tire because RF was 3/32" instead of 4/32".

Give me a break!!! The damn tires only had 24.5K on 'em.

I agree with this. The term Hypocrite is often misused. Key, once again, nails it.

Well Said!!

Below, is a comment from The Dragon Bear Cave on my post which was inspired by this post.

She is right you know.

My adorable wife and I went to the Zoo yesterday, and just about every damn animal was asleep.

It was a good day anyway…got to test out my new ride…which I’m afraid to drive.

Geoffrey's night out.

"Every time I go to a rally or anti-protest, I always come away with a much stronger sense that I'm on the right team." Here's how Geoffrey's evening went.

I agree!!!

Kelley is slow dancing with Nothing Left to Lose.

Thanks...

Eric, the Straight White Guy, is on it.

This will make you smile.

Thanks to DGCI for the link.

Leaders React!

Too Good!!!

As always…I awoke this morning, ground fresh coffee beans, and made a pot of coffee. I was walking with a full cup from the kitchen, through the dining room; to my office…about twenty feet away…and I had to sneeze. I was equidistant from the dining room table and a chest-of-drawers…about three feet. Didn’t make it.

It is impossible to sneeze with a full cup of anything, and not spill it.

Oh well….

As I've said before, the upcoming Presidential Election might be the most important one in the foreseeable future.

Bill Whittle puts it, and more, in perspective.

Go read AND THEN A MIRACLE OCCURS...

Another good one from Anne.

Go read it....

Yes, that’s right…I believe in torture. I believe comment spammers should die an excruciatingly painful and unhurried death.

Well, it's Springing up...not quite, but almost. My beautiful wife and I, went for a drive this afternoon in the same "get down, floor it and hold on" amazing piece of machinery that I mentioned in an earlier post.

It was a good day.

This reminds me of my bunch. The guy in the middle must be "fast on his feet".

Anyway, I'd buy 'em all a cold beverage.

rm -rf John Kerry*

That'll do it.

A Lawyer cuts through the crap.

Summary of Stewart Juror's Remarks: We see the big Picture

Well, the horns are honking over here and here and here and here.

Go see for yourself.

I’m discussing the cost of replacing car keys with a friend today (electronic vs. the plain brass hardware store type), when a guy who’d been listening in the background stepped forward and asked…”did you see that car on TV last week?”

WTF – do you know how many cars I saw on TV last week?

Point was…he’d seen someone open the trunk of a car with a hand imprint.

Yeah, I saw it, and knew exactly what he was talking about. Right.

Bejus!!!! Some people never cease to amaze me.

I know this guy who started his own business, secured several large bank loans, and lost his wits.

He was doing quite well, had more business than he’d ever imagined, until he got a major case of the stubies (stupid).

He flies to Chicago for his high school reunion, and decides he needs to make an impression on his old friends…especially the ladies. Now, this guy was always “weird with women”, and I would say seriously socially challenged, but I never thought he was stupid. Until this…..

He rents a car, drives to the Ferrari dealership, and pays cash for a new 328-GTSi…about 100 Grand. The salesman asked him if he wanted to test drive it and he said he didn’t know how to drive a “stick shift”.

Pick me up off the floor!!! I would’ve loved to see the look on the salesman’s face.

So…. the salesman takes him out to the back lot…and in 30 minutes teaches him how to use a clutch and gear shift…get this…in a Maserati.

He then lurches off in his brand new red Ferrari to pick up a young lady, who by the way was not his wife, for a night of who knows what.

Less than 100 miles later, he’d done 27K in damage to the front end, given the girl some non-life threatening injuries, and basically humiliated himself. You see...he wrecked his new toy in front of all his friends in the driveway at the country club. They were all watching him make his grand approach, and he put it into a tree. Dumbass.

Anyway, this little stunt cost him his marriage and his company. He was divorced and bankrupt before the car got out of the shop, which was 8 months later.

I was having a discussion about death and dying with a friend of mine the other day. It made me consider this:

I was a Pallbearer twelve times before I reached twenty-nine years of age, for people my own age. Natural causes...NO.

Automobile / Motorcycle accidents, drug overdoses, fluke accidents, suicide, drowning, murder, etc.

...and there were many more funerals, where I just stood with the crowd.

I wish it wasn’t a fact.

I learned to swim when I was three years of age, and take it for granted; but I know people who never learned, for whatever reason, to survive in water. I’ve seen, firsthand, someone in water who couldn’t swim…and it was a harrowing experience. If they'd been alone, they would have drowned.

Why…it could be a past traumatic experience with water, or their parents couldn’t swim and therefore were unable to teach them, or didn’t think it was important…or whatever… but everyone should know how to swim, or at least tread water.

The ability to swim has definitely saved my life on several occasions (some intentional, some not), and I feel this ability should be a “Life Requirement”.

Remember Water Babies? I’m all for it – the sooner, the better.

I was tired, but refreshed, after reading this.

I started the first round of spring-cleaning yesterday...and the only thing out of the ordinary is the snow on the ground.

This is a Fact!

Southern Women will make you “weak in the knees”…especially if they have “soup cooling lips”, like my wife….

This is a compliment!!!

...more later

One Taste of the Bait...is Worth the Pain of the Hook!!!

--- Webb Wilder

"Senator" *spit* Hillary Clinton has managed to open her yap once again and stuck her size 20 hoof in it. This article in liberal rag *spit* Newsday *spit* shows just how arrogant this cow really is.

Debbie over at DGCI is downtown with this rant.

Click Here to read it.

My neighbor Buck, and his wife are both 86 years of age. They’ve lived here since before there were roads. They are, in my opinion, a great couple. I hope my wife and I are as fortunate as them.

Buck still cuts his grass, trims his bushes, splits and hauls his logs for the fire, rakes his leaves, shovels the snow from his driveway, and still manages to rid the front nine of the golf course across the street of all errant golf balls. He has thousands…

My wife once said I should help him with these chores, and I told her that if I started doing that, he would die. We agree now, he’s not yet ready for help. I have offered, and was politely and sincerely turned down but that doesn’t stop us from keeping them supplied with my wife’s world-class apple, oatmeal, and raisin cookies. He said they were the best he’d ever had, and I believe him, because they are better than good. Coming from someone who is 86; that’s a hell of a compliment.

I plant a large vegetable garden every year, and they grow so many flowers their yard looks like a botanical garden. They can walk on over anytime and pick whatever they want from my garden, and they keep my house supplied with fresh-cut flowers all season long. I love the smell of fresh flowers.

Buck offered me the use of his 410 (when he learned all I had was a 12 gauge) to deal with the squirrels that were eating my garden. Most people don’t offer up their firearms to their neighbors.

They are good people.

When my wife and I travel, we leave them in charge. Buck collects our mail and any packages daily, checks the doors, and does a “walk around” of the perimeter. He also collects all the fallen sticks and limbs and deposits them in the “pile out back”.

He ENJOYS doing this, and I believe IT IS good for him.

For the record:

I'm proud to say...I have NEVER watched an episode of either one.

...but I am sure... I read a lot of good books during those hours.

There were a lot of these where I grew up, and I've seen many "wild kingdom takedowns".

...but I never saw anything like this.

I've been actively boycotting the French since those Cheesy Weasels chose to side with Iraq. After all, the French are responsible for the deaths of Americans.

I was a member of the Rare Breed Society, and it was agonizing to learn that a French Conglomerate owns my favorite Kentucky Bourbon. No more Wild Turkey. Damn!

Anyway, I fell off the wagon. I wish I had an excuse, but I don’t. While on the French (not the Dutch) side of St. Maarten, I acquired some COHIBA - La Habana -Cuban cigars.

Now, I don't appreciate a good cigar like my friend Jim over at Smoke on the Water, but I know a good smoke when I taste one. These are good, and fresh.

I guess the problem is I bought 'em on French soil.

I screwed up, but to hell with France…

There are reports that we have Osama bin Laden surrounded, and are tracking his miserable ass with satellites.

This doesn’t surprise me since our government can track a mad cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington. Also, they can track her calves to their stalls.

But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country.

Go Figure!

1. The only exercise some people get is jumping to conclusions.

2. Some minds are like concrete - all mixed up and permanently set.

3. It's O.K. to ask dumb questions - they're easier to handle than dumb mistakes.

It's the truth.

What would you choose?

Colloquial English phrase for a choice that is not a choice - either there is only one option, or two options that are equally undesirable or virtually identical.

Is this the same thing as a CatchTwentyTwo? No. CatchTwentyTwo is when both (or all) choices are contradictory. You have to be crazy to want to fly a mission, so you're grounded. But if you are scared, you're sane, so you are required to fly.

Tobias Hobson (c. 1544-1631) was a Cambridge stable manager who let horses. He insisted customers take the horse in the stall closest to the door (the next one up) or take none at all. Hence, a Hobson's choice is no choice at all. He was made famous by Milton. The phrase dates to 1660.

I was watching Bill O'Reilly interview Rudy Giuliani on the O'Reilly Factor, and the arrogance O'Reilly showed was discomforting. He said to Mr. Giuliani, I know how much money you are making on the lecture circuit, because we share the same lecture agent. Who cares?

Now, does O'Reilly believe he's in the same league with Giuliani? I believe he thinks he is, but ask Bill about his book sales, and see what happens.

I'm just saying....

Yet another interesting post coming out of the Dragon Bear Cave.

There is a war going on in the comments. Check IT out!

Oh well, you've gotta do what you've gotta do!

***Update***

He ain't really all that gone.

There is a guy out here in the blogosphere I've read for a long time. As a matter of fact, he is one reason I started this piddly ass blog. His friends think he is in trouble. Whether he knows it or not - his friends are people who care about him. Apparently, he doesn't realize it.

Everyone seems to be blogging about it, but doing nothing.

I think Key might have to make a short road trip.

Someone needs to cut to the chase, and stop the the speculating. Either there is, or isn't, a problem. At least she could take a look see, and then you'll know.

Right or wrong - someone has to do it. Agent Key - this will self destruct in....

If he's pretending - that's good - then you can be pissed. If he's not - then the trip will be well worth it.

Of course - he could be faking it.

And most probably - I should've kept my mouth shut. But.....

Here is the *UPDATE*

Captain Kangaroo is gone. He's now with Mr. Greenjeans.

My friend Rosen, who is Nepalese, lives in a village on top of a big hill. From there you can see another village on top of another hill. It's a 5-minute helicopter ride between the two, or a 3-DAY hike.

That's some tall hills, eh?

Eric made me remember.

I was in the fifth grade and it was the last day of school. I was headed to Florida with my family the following day for a vacation. My brother and I were looking forward to it - I think my parents were as well.

I'm riding on the back fender of my friend’s bicycle, when we hit a "bump". My foot went into the spokes. I sliced my heel to the bone, which means my Achilles tendon was completely severed. I was wearing shoes.

I'll spare you all of the details...but let me say....I'm (my foot is) still not right...even after surgery and the years. Damn thing just won't stretch out.

It didn't stop me from getting my ass kicked in contact sports, but it did enable me to forecast the weather.

Anyway, it's by far the worst injury I've ever had - and I've had a lot.

Give me a shout if you want to know if it's going to rain.

Excerpt:

"...Exhausted...drunk...and extremely pleased with ourselves after our assault, I sheathed my sword..."

Head on over to the Straight White Guy and read this.

Thanks for the pointer Donnie, he's right.

...speaking of cell phones. If you have a cell phone and give the number to people - Turn the damn thing on!

Having a cell phone that is "turned off" is like having a gun with no bullets.

That dog won't hunt.

I was thinking about what I do for a living. I'm very fortunate - I've got a great job, BUT every time my cell rings I know in the back of my mind that I might have to drop everything and head for an airport.

Damn - for me, this defines 24/7.

Once upon a time I was in a bar. It was a hot summer night, and raining like hell. The place was packed and the service was good. Amazing! Anyway, a couple of guys got crossed up, and drew their guns. The next thing I knew – the guy next to me was dead, (we were shoulder to shoulder) and his brains were splattered all over me. (took an errant .45 to the forehead – missed me by 15 in.) If you’ve never seen gray matter, well I just don’t know what to say. Brains are gooey. I exited the bar (hauled my ass out as fast as I could – had some friends with me as well), and met the 60 year old Cop who was about to retire on the way in with a Billy Club. I said “You’re going to need a little more than that club – they’ve got guns going on in there”. He ran in anyway, turned his ass around, broke for cover, and called for backup. It was like the Wild Wild West.

Bottom Line: 3 DEAD & 2 WOUNDED.

Bad JuJu!

Anyone want to go drinking with me? Shit happens.

Good thing it was raining – I was able to wash in the gutter.

I'm telling you - it will cut right through you. If it is 10 degrees out, and you are hit with a 40 knot blast - it hurts.

I'm ready to go. It's just too damn cold.

Oh Well!

I'm new to this, but do y'all get as much weird correspondence as I do? Man, there are some Whackos out there.

For around here anyway.

It snowed hard yesterday from 5:00 am. until (about) 2:00 pm. It's all still here - none of it has melted. I have a huge thermometer on a tree in the back yard - it hasn’t moved one degree all day. Not even in the sun.

No big deal - BUT IT WAS 73 degrees five days ago.

Damn, this weather is crazy!

Whap!!!

Thanks to Dragon Bear Cave.

I'm sitting here blogging, and my wife just cruised by and handed me a note.

Sam,

I love you Moore!

Damn - Life is good!

This is folding money, but she is done.

Jack is the Man, again!

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into perspective in one of its releases:

A billion seconds ago, it was 1959.

A billion minutes ago, Jesus was alive.

A billion hours ago, our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.

A billion dollars ago was only 8 hours and 20 minutes, at the rate Washington spends it.

The Democrats are complaining on how long the war is taking but consider this:

It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno to take the Branch Davidian compound. That was a 51-day operation.

It took less time to find Saddam's sons in Iraq than it took Hillary Clinton to find the Rose Law Firm billing records.

It took less time for the 3rd Infantry Division and the Marines to destroy the Medina Republican Guard than it took Teddy Kennedy to call the police after his Oldsmobile sunk at Chappaquiddick.

It took less time to take Iraq than it took to count the votes in Florida!!!!!! Man, our military is GREAT !.

Can you have a friend you've never met?

I never thought about it until I started this Blog.

What do you think?

...officers tried to see if Battle showed up on the store’s surveillance cameras but the store owner said the cameras were broken.

What a Dumbass! Dumbass if she's telling the truth, Dumbass if she's lying.

How do you support a Dumb Ass?

Answer - you can't, get a new job!

It amazes me - I've been saying the same thing for years, and they still DON'T get it. They say they do, but they don't. We're talking rocks here folks - rocks.

People who refuse to think for themselves. You know the type?

I've explained, in detail, how things work. Does it make a difference? NO! Is it way over their heads? YES!

And you know what else? - I hate it when someone agrees with me just for the sake of agreeing. I've been known to throw 'em a curve every now and again.

Good thing I got a new glove for Christmas. Catching bullshit, for me, is easier than throwing it. Know what I mean?

This year, I'll be doing some Slow Dancing.

Just Damn! - sorry Dax.

I'm fortunate; I know a lot of people and I have great friends. Problem is, I only hear from some of 'em once a year in the form of a Christmas card.

I can do better than that, and "this" is my first New Year's resolution.

I'm going to contact everyone I know in 2004. Everyone!

She is DOWNTOWN!

President Bush said Libyan envoys approached Prime Minister Tony Blair and him about nine months ago. Today, December 19, 2003, is the nine-month anniversary of the first night of bombing in Operation Iraqi Freedom!

This is just additional proof that his statement of saying that he wanted Osama bin Laden, Dead or Alive, has been heard around the world. The United States will not tolerate terrorists, those that harbor terrorists, and those that threaten our safety with weapons of mass destruction. Bush says what he means and means what he says. YES!

During his Presidency, Bush has attacked with military precision Afghanistan and Iraq, when needed. He has publicly disdained the North Korean grandiose threats, telling the world that the United States will not bow to nuclear threats, insisting and getting multi-lateral cooperation and talks with the Asian powers now involved. And now we have an example of very quiet diplomacy with Libya.

Yes, the UN will be the instrument of measurement of Libya's follow-through with the agreement, but it was the United States and Britain, whose strength was shown in leading the coalition, who brokered the agreement. Not France, not Germany, not Russia, and definitely not the UN.

Iran had already seen the writing on the wall, and went through UN channels, rather than deal with the coalition.

I look forward to the next announcement, will it be Syria?

Have you ever really been scared?

When I was living on the Atlantic coast in north Florida, I had a two-man Air Force survival raft. One day when the surf was up, a friend and I decided to paddle out past the breakers and ride the 10-foot swells. We were in the bottom of a swell about 500 yards off shore, paddling and splashing around like children, when a shark surfaced in the top of the swell ABOVE us. I could see it's eye, it's teeth, and it was longer than the raft. I could have touched it with the oar. The shark swam 270 degrees around the raft, and then submerged. We thought, "Damn - it's going to ram us". Needless to say, we stopped paddling and sat up on the sides of the raft, and waited. When you’re sitting on the edge, it's hard to keep stable. I don't know whether or not I should have been, but I was actually scared at that moment.

We decided, that rather than draw attention to us by paddling, we'd just drift in to shore. Problem was, we were in a sideways current that was taking us toward a jetty where the waves were breaking on the rocks. We thought that would probably kill us, and it damn near did, but it was better than being eaten.

Seems funny now.

Special Thanks to Al Gore for inventing the Internet.

It sure does make Christmas Shopping easier.

This is Radical!!!

Hat Tip to Jack.

Isn't it unfortunate that the three major networks choose to ignore these facts every evening?

If you have a chance to watch any TV reports, or read newspapers, you would think Iraq under the Americans is going to hell in a hand basket.

Here are some of CPA's hard, cold facts you need to keep in mind when talking about Iraq. And these don't even include the benefits accruing to the Iraqis through Task Force RIE, whose story has yet to be told.....

Global Warming. Who gives a shit? Well actually I do, but the number one priority (right now at this moment) should be eliminating the threat posed by the IslamoFascists. After all, they want a Muslim Planet and are willing to kill every non-Muslim man, woman, and child to achieve this. These people, are crazy, extremely dangerous, and serious.

The techniques we’ll probably have to use to quench this threat are definitely conducive to global warming.

We're damn lucky Gore and his mob aren't dirving.

If we don't solve the terrorism problem first, Global Warming won't matter.

Anyway, go on over to Key Issues and follow all the links for a great "back and forth".

I've been gone for what seems like forever. (I take many emergency business trips) It's good to be home. You know, when you travel weekdays and weekends (business or pleasure), you miss your bed; you miss small things like grinding coffee beans, your "blogging workspace", your solitude, your back yard, your stuff, your machines, and your freezer food. I just miss the shit I take for granted.

But, there is (are) nothing BETTER than friends.

Sometimes, staying at home is good.

All said and done - I'm heading for the Caribbean in early 2004. Meeting up with my four best friends and their mates. Do you think we'll have any fun?

I am not moving until Xmas. I'm digging in.

That’s the way it's going to be. Period.

The Supreme Commander agrees.

Life is good!

I was having a conversation with a friend the other night, and the following question was posed.

Is there such a thing as an original thought?

What do y'all think?

The plot thickens.

Ah - now we have it. My wife was reading Key's (whom she affectionately refers to as my internet chick – that’s a compliment by the way) blog last night, and I was splainin' how posted comments are for the world to see. The reason I was splainin' comments is because I caught my wife doing a little "minimize in a hurry" maneuver. I thought nothing of it until Today. In my small mind, I failed to consider email.

My beautiful wife is busted!

From Laura Ingraham:

I always thought it was a much more difficult project than the Administration was prepared to admit.

— Hillary "Nostradamus" Clinton, on our Iraq stabilization and reconstruction efforts.

You know, a million years ago I decided I would spend Thanksgiving with my friends and Christmas with my parents. I've been doing this for what seems like forever. This worked great, but now that my parents are both dead, it makes you think. I really miss them. It dosen't matter if I was right or wrong. What does matter is this: if you don't have friends, you have NOTHING!

Remember - no friends (true friends) = misarable life.

I'm very fortunate!!!

That's just the way it is.

My two cents:

Had to be more than one shooter. There is no way Oswald could've gotten off those shots in that time frame, and been accurate at that range and angle, with a bolt action rifle with a bad site. No way.

I just heard that one of my binary dreamer friends is making a career move. Good for him, not good for me. He saved my ass on a number of occasions.

I wish him well, and I know that he will be successful in whatever he chooses.

I hope our paths cross in the future.

Cool Runnings my friend!

There is no problem that cannot be solved by the appropriate application of high explosives.

I was in another town the other day, talking with my good friend Eric, and learned something. Eric, who is older than I, is the type of guy you want to have around when the chips are down. I mean, he is a standup get down type of guy and he’ll cover your back. When the shit hits the fan, you can always depend on Eric. Eric understands Honor. Eric knows what true friendship is. Eric is a humble man. Eric is a bad ass.

Eric had just been to his doctor who informed him that, in his opinion, the muscles in his heart were deteriorating. His doctor said, “you might die soon”, but “we’ll run some tests in two days.”

Eric said to me, “You know Sam, if I die, so be it. I should have died when I was twenty. The last forty years were a gift. I remember when I was twenty years of age, laying in that rice paddy in Viet Nam amongst my buddies brains, intestines, and severed limbs. I was the only one not hit. The VC even blew up the chopper. Everyone died but me. So whatever happens, I’m OK with it.”

This happened on his first tour, he volunteered for a second and was wounded (shot) multiple times on three separate occasions.

Anyway, I could hardly swallow when I asked him – “If you do die, can I have your Pearl .45’s?” You might think this callous, but your wrong, it’s the way true friends communicate with each other.

Many years ago, we discussed this same situation. Very interesting - how people reflect.

Bottom Line: The doctor was wrong, and Eric and I have some more drinking and talking to do. Life is good!

But I still want the guns!!!

So, Congress is complaining on how long Bush’s war is taking but consider this: It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno to take the Branch Davidian compound. That was a 51-day operation. It took less time to find evidence of chemical weapons in Iraq than it took Hillary Clinton to find the Rose Law Firm billing records. (They conveniently appeared shortly after the statute of limitations had run out.) It took less time for the 3rd Infantry Division and the Marines to storm the Medina Republican Guard than it took Teddy Kennedy to call the police after his Oldsmobile sunk at Chappaquiddick. It took less time to take Iraq than it took to count the votes in Florida.

Our new Nickel is being released to commemorate the 200th anniversary of the Louisiana Purchase. Thomas Jefferson will stay on the "heads" side. On the "tails" side, it has an image of an American shaking hands with a Frenchman.

Not very forward thinking of our friends at the U.S. Mint.

At least the French got the "ass end" of the deal, again. We clipped them on the original deal in the first place.

I was just thinking. If there are 2 billion Muslims on planet Earth, and only 1% (20 million) aspire to murderous suicide / homicide acts of terror, we've got a long row to hoe. But it also means they need to come up with 1 billion, 440 million virgins.

Now, that's a bunch of hoes

Longhorn, yet another "bet the company" product from Microsoft, is it's biggest release of this decade and the biggest since Windows 95, is being announced three years early. However, Microsoft gave no timetable for the launch of the software, which has already slipped to a later timetable than originally thought. With Longhorn now not expected before 2006, it is just more of the same from Microsoft - which is nothing new.

At the heart of the next Windows will be a new format for storing data that Microsoft has worked on intermittently for more than a decade. Rather than each software application saving information in a different format, a new standardized file system known as WinFS will create a single, unified system.

What a concept!

Anyway, go here for a good laugh.

I would consider what I do for a living, as well as my hobbies, to be highly technical. I have some friends (means we can have a cold beverage together) who are so intelligent they amaze me. There's nothing better than conversing with someone really knowledgeable or having a game of chess when your opponent is better than you. I am very fortunate to know people with minds of this caliber, and I do not take them for granted. They have saved my ass on many occasions.

I have a great deal of admiration for them.

So, my point is: these folks must dream in binary.

I was just thinking. If there are 2 billion Muslims on planet Earth, and only 1% (20 million) aspire to murderous suicide / homicide acts of terror, we've got a long row to hoe. But it also means they need to come up with 1 billion, 440 million virgins.

Now, that's a bunch of hoes