Bummer:

Louisiana will become the last U.S. state to outlaw Cockfighting under a bill approved by the state legislature on Wednesday.

Ever been to a Cockfight? There is nothing like going deep into the woods after dark to some dilapidated barn, doing sips of burns blue beads clear, and watching a bunch of roosters slaughter each other. The money is good if you know your chickens.

On an unrelated matter...I'm honored that Tiger Woods named his daughter after me. Thanks Bro...and yes, her name is Sam, not Samantha.

I'm putting together a Blog Meet in The Land of Fire....aka Tierra del Fuego.

If you're interested...contact me...we're gonna have a good time.

Heading to New York for several days...I have no idea where I'm going, but my GPS does...should.

I think...therefore, I really don't care.

...but Fucking is simply Fucking to us...

...so how about a little Jimi Hendrix and B.B King.

...talking 'bout soup cooling lips...baby, I need your loving...oh yes I do.

I'm a fortunate man...I've seen and wiggled with most of the old mid to tail end 60's black male and female bands. I was always one of the few crackers in the audience. Yeap, we were Crackers back then...and I could put a blaze on them skates, and I can feel things.

I swear to the Maker, unless you've gotten down with the brothers and sisters...you ain't been down. I should tell you my Respect story. I made a fool of myself...in a good way.

I ain't gonna do you wrong!

More later

I don't talk about sex on this blog, but I just received a package that is downright orgasmic.

Dayum...I'm in shock...Reproduction is in order.

Thank you my friend.

...or knowing whats going on around you.

I have a great deal of admiration for a Waffle House cook...yes I do...even when I'm drunk. It never ceases to amaze me that these short order cooks can take multiple orders from every direction, and not fuck it up. They just keep flipping and scooting and plating and starting over again.

Concentration defined.

About twenty of us, and about twenty more of another group, hit one the other early morn. Everyone was toast...but not the grill girl...she had everyone's order ready at about the same time...and they were accurate. Amazing.

Of course, we had to wait out the Cops parked across the street.

Bwahahahahahah!!!

If anyone wants to know what a Black man looks like trapped in a White man's body... Click Here

I can also do the Tighten Up

As I recall, that was a great night!!!

That's a Fact. I'm on the left...in the photo...bwahahahahahahah! 1st time ever I've been on the left.

Anyway...

Had a phone call the other day from the guy who played the Sax in Sam (Moore) & Dave's band in 1968.

He was looking for another Sam Moore, but after I told him, "I'm a Black Man trapped in a White man's body...we talked for about 45 minutes.

I'm still a Soul Man

I can't make this shit up.

My woman grew into some fairly serious food allergies about ten or eleven years ago. I'm talking Anaphylactic Shock kind of serious, as in three ambulance rides to the Emergency Room within two weeks. She could've easily died without the emergency medical treatments. Scary stuff. One time, I was standing at the end of her bed in the emergency room...she was surrounded by six or seven doctors, nurses and technicians, and her eyes rolled back and she rose up, and then collapsed. I thought she died, and I think they did as well. I will never, as long as I live, forget that.

She had the full battery of skin tests then...eighty plus pricks and under-skin injections on her back and arms, and it was determined she was MAJOR allergic to Soy, Peanuts, and all tree nuts. Soy is in fucking everything...even a Hershey's chocolate bar.

We adjusted our diets accordingly, and just dealt with it as best we could. We really could not go "out to eat" unless we went to a nice restaurant with a chef who knew EXACTLY what was in the food they prepared. For example, we generally make all of our bread...Soy is in 99.99% of bread. We had cards printed, in several languages, to give to the dumber than dumb-ass servers we usually encountered. For the last ten or eleven years I have read every label on everything I've purchased in every store. I upped my optical prescription because the fucking print is so small. Better than the alternative.

It changed my life just like hers. I do loves me my sweetie.

We adapted together. We had to...no choice. No big deal, actually it is a much bigger deal for the people we're around because they just don't seem to understand what Anaphylaxis is. Don't get me wrong...some do, but more do not.

Six years ago we moved from point A to B, and had the same tests done which provided the same results...Major life threatening reactions to Soy, Peanuts, and tree nuts. Oh well...business as usual...we decided to just keep on keeping on...actually, we had no choice.

Two weeks ago...we had the same tests done...same results, but this time I / we were a little more concerned because she tested major positive for tomatoes and onions, which we eat everyday...and green beans. It didn't make any sense, to me / us.

We were consulting with the doctor, and I was telling him basically he was a Voodoo Man and I was gonna put Yabu on his ass, and I / we didn't believe the diagnosis. There is no way she is allergic to some of the food groups she tested positive for...we eat 'em everyday. We were suspicious.

Bombshell:

He said maybe we should do some blood work.

Excuse me, but I said, "What the fuck are you talking about?" I don't care if it cost a million fucking dollars...do it...why didn't you do it before? The jury is still out on that one...I don't think the tests were available when this nightmare started...but I'm going to find out. Find out for certain. There will be no recourse; we just want to know.

My Sweetie goes in and gives 33 vials of blood...one for each food group that is suspect. The results come back with a BIG GOOSE EGG across the board. WTF is going on with that? The results state that she is allergic to NOTHING. They state that EVERY test she has had returned a false positive. WTF is going on with that?

11 Fucking Years!

There is no doubt that she went into Anaphylactic Shock on several occasions, but the cause was apparently misdiagnosed...multiple times. Something caused it for certain, but I don't think it was food...I think it was more likely environmental.

Two Days Ago:

She goes in for the Soy Challenge, because we just don't believe the results. The challenge is done in a controlled environment in the Allergists office or the emergency room...whatever is more convenient. I kid you not.

The doctor used Soymilk for this first test. His call. First they smeared some on her arm and checked it twenty minutes later, and then they put some on her lips, and then she drank a teaspoon, and then she drank a tablespoon, and then another tablespoon, and then she did a shot, and the she drank a cup...and there was no reaction. None Whatsoever.

What does this prove? I'm not sure, but I will say skin tests for food allergies are a bunch of voodoo. You are just as likely to have a false positive as not. Go for the blood work.

Note: We used several different doctors in different states, but until the blood analysis became available, we lived a different life.

Am I pissed? Yes and no. Are we going to pursue this, as in going after anyone? Absolutely not. Are we better cooks? Absolutely.

The next challenge (July) will be peanuts.

Life is good my friends, just understand we had second and third, and fourth, and fifth opinions...and they all got it wrong...except for this last guy.

This will be a life changing experience for us...in a positive way, but she will always have epinephrine with her, in an EpiPen. Always.

...for a few days.

Latitude: 33" 41' 20"

Longitude: -78" 53' 12"

Gotta put some bread on the table.

I am such a dumb ass, and slow to catch on.

If you're in the presence of Christina, and she flips you the peace sign...extended index and bird finger...she doesn't mean Peace...she means Strike Two, or your ass is real damn close to being put in Time Out...or worse.

Bwahahahahahahahah!

I am honored to have been flipped by her. She runs an efficient, but tight, ship.

I kid you not, and her children will agree.

Let me ask you a hypothetical question. What do you think America would do if Canadian soldiers were firing dozens of missiles every day into Buffalo, N.Y.? What do you think our response would be if Mexican troops for two years had launched daily rocket attacks on San Diego -- and bragged about it?

...If the world doesn't act to stop Iran's nuclear ambitions, it must be prepared for the consequences of Israel defending itself.

Have you ever been seasick?

I haven't, but I was on a 65 foot Swan about three quarters of the way to the Abacos from South Florida...and it was blowing like hell (steady 45 knots...gusting way higher)...and my buddy had a bad time with it. So bad, he not only had the pukes...he had major vertigo. We thought he might die, and so did he. I swear to the Maker, I've never seen anyone that sick in my life. We were truly worried...out in the ocean, in the middle of nowhere, you are alone. There is no help close by. That is food for thought.

Sailboats are, by physics, much more stable than stinkpots (boats with a motor), but once you're sick...you're sick. There is no getting well until you reach dry ground...and even then it takes time.

They say motion sickness is caused by an imbalance in your inner ear, and by losing sight of the horizon. I can't say for sure, but what I can say is that my buddy was in bad shape. Real bad shape. He had us all worried.

We finally made port, and I kid you not...he couldn't stand without assistance for two days...he was that fucked up.

Funny thing is...We'd been sailing in some pretty good blows before...no problem. This one just got him...I mean I was pulling G's on the fore deck.

It wasn't like this was his first time in some big seas, but it was his first time taking everything for granted.

Live and learn.

You cannot tame Mother Nature. To be completely honest, I was a little worried myself. A 65 footer is a pretty good sized boat, but when you're in the middle of the ocean...can't see anything but BIG swells and waves...no land...it does tend to make you think. Did I mention, it was blowing the squirrels out of the trees?

He got his legs (equilibrium) back in a few days, and everything was good. Shit happens.

One thing I remember...when someone is that sick and there is nothing you can do to help 'em...helpless was defined for me.

Super Rubber

Firewalls are MOST important. I'm not talking about virus protection, and I'm damn sure not talking about that lame firewall shit that comes with Windows. I'm talking about real major protection...among other things. Configuration protection is easier than you might think.

For all you folks out there who don't want to donate your old obsolete PC to a Church, etc., and want a real Linux Firewall / Router, but don't want to, or can't write the scripts...here's my recommendation.

Tom Eastep dreams in binary, and provides this for free. Shorewall is free but if you try it and find it useful, please consider making a donation to the Alzheimer's Association or to the Starlight Children's Foundation. You can find the links on his site. I don't know him, and I'm not plugging him, except for...he can write some top-of-the-line scripts.

Anyway, a properly configured Linux Firewall is like the Energizer Bunny...it just keeps running and running and running. Mine has been running since 1999 without an involuntary reboot, and I don't run Shorewall. That's what I would call "running underwater."

Rule of thumb...only allow inbound traffic from an established or related outbound connection. Turn EVERYTHING off, including Ping. Look at the logs...you will be amazed at how many attempts are made to hack your system. Amazed.

Also, turn that Windows auto-update shit OFF.

I'm just sayin'

I've been tweaking my new 24 incher iMac Catdaddy...and let me tell you...this thing is way too cool...I'm impressed. It will run Piece of Shit Windows in a separate space...no reboot required...and remain stable. It is also the king of Multimedia. Although, you have to pay to play.

Anyway, I've been saying for the last several years that this next Presidential election is probably the most important one in my life. These crazies on the left, if they have their way and are successful, will doom us...and our children. We are all fucked if a Democrat is elected. Plain and simple. We need a viable third party, but we don't have one...so you've got to vote for the future. There is no way around that. Things are changing

I found this interesting:

This will be the first election without incumbents since 1952.

This will be the most expensive election in American history.

If the costs for both Democratic and Republican campaigns are added together (for the Presidential primary election, general election, and the political conventions, they should be somewhere in the neighborhood of...for comparison purposes:

$448.9 million in 1996
$649.5 million in 2000
$1.01 billion in 2004

You can do the math...guesstimate the number for 2008. Crazy.

I wonder how much it would cost to nuke Iran. or California?

I'm just sayin'...if the Democrats gain control at the top...we are all fucked...including you Democrats out there.

Scary

Wee One to Zonker and I.

"You look like Won Tons. Me, really?... Wee One, yes, and I'm gonna fry you up...Me, really?...Zonker...no? Wee One...Yes...and then she looks at me with those beautiful slang eyes and says..."I'm gonna fry you first because you're smaller"

By the way, Zonker was on his knees...and he was damn near as tall as me...I was swearing him in for the weekend.

Damn, I can't make this up.

My little buddy Wee is a pistol; which ,I guess, goes hand in hand if you're from TEXAS.

Bwahahahahahahahahahahah....

I do loves me a cute girl.

In honor of the first day of hurricane season, which is today.

Bitch Slap to Catfish